It Was That Night by Rikke Barfod

Author:Rikke Barfod
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: N/A
ISBN: 9788793886049
Publisher: ePublishify
Published: 2019-08-20T16:00:00+00:00



Chapter 23

Claire

6th April 1983

Isaac is here. He was looking stooped and very sad when he came. He gave me some sumptuous chocolate from the boat. He, Mum and Ursula are in the living-room. It was obvious that I was not wanted. Apart from that, I have my own plans. Mum still doesn’t know how much I have read in her diary – but I have to see what happened. My inner voice is working overtime. I pretend not to listen and creep up to the attic – even if I shake a bit – the way you do when you know you’re going to do something wrong and have that ice cold feeling in your stomach, and you have to toss your head in order to convince yourself that what you’re doing is Okay.

So, where did I get to? Oh yeah, Mum meeting Isaac. I find the date again, 13th May 1957. This stuff is boring, it’s all about her thoughts and a guy she’s in love with. That is not my business. It’s too weird anyway to think that one’s mother has ever been like oneself. It’s too embarrassing. Oh, here’s something.

Tuesday, 23. July 1963

Dear friend diary, do you know how it feels to be Jewish? I am Jewish, but I don’t feel it at all. All I know is that you are not supposed to eat pork. I wish I knew some Jews I could talk to. Maybe the library has some books I can read.

Wednesday 15. August 1963

A letter has arrived from Israel. Mother has cried. Father walks around, saying nothing.

Dear diary I am going to Gerda’s place.

There was a letter for me from Isaac. Gerda’s mother thinks that Gerda has a pen-friend! MY FATHER HAS BEEN FOUND. Why don’t Father and Mother say anything?

My father. My father. I feel like a sack of fleas. I want to visit him. I have started listening at doors. How else can I get to know anything? I heard Mother ask Father whether they should tell me. Tell me what? Isaac has already told me that my real father has been found.

I overhear Father say that he thinks they should wait telling me until I have finished school.

Who do they think they are fooling, by not saying anything? And how can they? It is my father. I do understand that Mother is afraid. Maybe she thinks that I don’t want to live here anymore. How insane. This is my home. But I want so, so much to meet my real father.

I phoned Isaac and he agreed to meet me in Elsinore next Saturday.

Saturday 17th August 1963

Dear friend diary, It was strange seeing him after such a long time. We met at a cafe. But when I told him that I wanted to go to Germany and meet my father, he said that maybe it wasn’t such a good idea, because when his father and mother went to see Jacov, he had thrown them out.

I protested and said that it was my father and that I still have dreams about the woman who calls me and says, “Find Ursula.

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