How to Forgive...When You Don't Feel Like It by June Hunt

Author:June Hunt
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
Tags: Counsel, Psychology, Christian Life, General, Religion, Interpersonal Relations, Counseling, Social Psychology, Personal Growth, Counselor
ISBN: 9780736921480
Publisher: Harvest House Publishers
Published: 2007-07-14T22:00:00+00:00

Stage Two: Feel the Offense

In response to unjust treatment, we may feel anger, outrage, or even hatred. Still, some people avoid dealing honestly with their emotions because they believe it’s inappropriate or un-Christian to hate. But not all hatred is wrong. God hates evil. The Bible says, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven…a time to love and a time to hate.”6 All our rock-hard emotions need to be excavated rather than allowed to stay buried. Failing to acknowledge and experience pain results in rigid responses: suppression of feelings or outright denial.

Some people insist, “Her gossiping about me doesn’t really hurt—even though we are the best of friends. It was probably just a slip of the tongue, and who hasn’t been guilty of that?” The truth is, being mistreated by someone you love is painful, and does bother you. Without feeling, there can be no healing.

Notice how frequently the Bible mentions raw emotions. The psalmist wrote, “Out of the depths, I cry to you, O LORD.”7 And the prophet Jeremiah cried out, “Why is my pain unending and my wound grievous and incurable?”8 Such gut-level outpouring is therapeutic and curative.

However, when feelings are neglected or ignored, they become landmines in a war zone, buried beneath the surface, dangerous and explosive. The only way to eliminate their potential threat is to defuse them or detonate them. In either case, like landmines, they must be identified and handled with great care.

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