EverGreen by Abby Farnsworth

Author:Abby Farnsworth
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: World Castle Publishing, LLC
Published: 2022-04-04T12:08:14+00:00

Chapter 15 - Life Without You

I woke up the next morning and looked around the room. Ginger was slumped over in my comfy chair in the corner of the room. She was still wearing her clothes from the previous day and looked as if she hadn’t been asleep very long. Giselle was lying on the floor beside my bed with a pillow over her head. She was also still in the same clothes she had worn the night before, but she had taken her heels off and traded them for a pair of fuzzy socks. They both looked exhausted. I felt bad for keeping them up all night, but I didn’t think I could have made it without them. I thought we’d been close before, but I now knew that they were probably the most devoted friends I’d ever had. Especially now that Jack had seemingly ended our friendship.

Jack.... Thinking about him was like shoving a dagger into my heart. He’d been my everything for four years. He’d saved my life. Before Jack, I hadn’t had any friends. I’d been totally alone. Sure, there had been people that I’d talked to at school, but no one that I could truly bare my soul to. Jack had been like my twin flame. Losing him was like losing a piece of myself. He’d been there for me through everything, except for this. The worst part was, he hadn’t only turned away from me, he’d traded my friendship for the type of people we’d always fought against. The boys he’d been with last night, they were the type of people we’d promised ourselves we’d never be. In tenth grade, Jack had organized a Drug Free Clubs of America event, and now he was hanging out with people that smuggled alcohol onto school property. It’s not like he was discouraging their behavior either; he’d been participating in it. He wasn’t acting like the Jack I knew, the Jack that had been my best friend. He had never done anything like this before.

A horrible thought suddenly occurred to me. What if I’d driven him to this? What if his jealousy, loneliness, and despair at my not loving him back had caused him to go down this path? What if he was throwing his life away because of me. His eyes had looked grief-stricken last night, as if he’d lost someone. That, someone, had to be me. Not that he’d lost me in the literal sense, but he’d lost the possibility of my loving him. Maybe he’d finally accepted what I’d been asking him to all this time, that I was in love with Rowan. And with that, he’d realized that I’d never love him, not in the way he wanted me to. But I hadn’t denied him friendship; he’d denied that for himself. I had gone after him, urging him to come with me. I had to know that he had been the one to turn me away. That was his choice. Even though it was a result of his feelings for me, I was not the one at fault.

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