Confessions of a Pickup Artist Chaser: Long Interviews with Hideous Men by Thorn Clarisse

Author:Thorn, Clarisse [Thorn, Clarisse]
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
Published: 2012-03-07T16:00:00+00:00

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Throughout my research, I dated aggressively… more aggressively than I've ever dated before. Maybe part of me absorbed the frenetic PUA desire to "maximize" my corner of the so-called "dating market." Also, PUAs are often happy to remind you that women become hags once we pass a certain age. Every time a man talks about how older women are ugly, it increases my urge to savagely break hearts while I'm still in my 20s. I do my best to repress this urge. I don't want to harm any innocent bystanders.

Anyway, I was busy "maximizing." During one memorable weekend, I sent the following text message to both my best girlfriend and Twitter: "I know I'm past the point of no return when a date with a porn star goes better than last night's date with a grad student."

Gotta say, the porn star was a sweetheart, though he wasn't really into S&M. He met my mom once, and she liked him a lot. "He's got such a nice way about him," she said.

Oh, and let me give you a free example of how to pass a feminist shit test. One of my activist friends visited me in Chicago. We didn't have a romantic history, but we'd always had fun together, and his sexual interest was tacitly obvious. At one point, I teased him about the flowery way he wrote his name: "Doesn't that make people question your masculinity?"

He slanted his eyes at me, sideways, ironically. "What masculinity?"

I cracked up and gave him a hug. He was super fun in bed.

Adam was on my mind, though, and I was looking forward to seeing him again. Yet a curious thing happened as I planned my next trip to San Francisco. I arranged my schedule and I texted Adam the dates I'd be in the city, and he didn't get back to me for several days. And I freaked out.

I don't normally freak out when guys take a while to get back to my texts, emails or calls. In fact, I'm usually the person who takes a while to get back to other people. So it was weird that when Adam took a long time to respond to my text about dates, I got upset. I got so upset that I had to specifically sit down and calm myself. I got so upset that I started thinking about how to break it off, and that was when I decided I was being unreasonable. Or was I?

I remembered my freak-out moment in the street on Halloween. What was going on in my head? I've often thought that if I had a dollar for every relationship that ended because one partner felt too vulnerable, I'd be richer than Neil Strauss. So was it just that I really liked this guy, and that was making me feel vulnerable and scared? Or was this situation actually a terrible idea?

It was time to bring in the big guns. It was time for an evening consultation with my female best friend.

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