Complicit (A Legacy of Silence Book 1) by Rivers Amy

Author:Rivers, Amy [Rivers, Amy]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Compathy Press
Published: 2021-04-20T04:00:00+00:00

It was an unbelievable story, but Kate knew it was true. She thought back on those years. Tilly had become impossible to be around. She was moody. Angry. She screamed at their parents. She stayed out all night. And all Kate had thought at the time was how selfish Tilly was behaving. How much energy and grief her parents experienced. How much of their attention was on Tilly, and not on her.

Even now, with all her training and with everything she’d gone through, it hadn’t occurred to her that Tilly might have been assaulted. Now it all made sense, and the truth was more brutal than anything she could have imagined. Kate felt guilt sink its claws into her heart.

“You told Mom and Dad?” Kate asked.

“I told Dad,” Tilly said. “I told him Jacob raped me. He looked like he wanted to kill someone. Then I told him about the others. And I could see that he didn’t believe me, even before he said it. He told me that he had known those people for years, that it couldn’t have happened. Then he asked me if I was on drugs. It was the last time I had a real conversation with either Mom or Dad.”

The weight of Tilly’s story threatened to crush Kate. The room was suddenly too hot, the blanket too confining. Kate shoved the covers away and hopped up.

“What’s wrong?” Tilly asked, looking concerned.

“I’m having a panic attack,” Kate mumbled, walking into the kitchen for a glass of water as her heart thumped wildly and the world started to spin. She was surprised to feel Tilly’s hand on her back .

“Take some slow breaths,” Tilly cooed, her voice soft and soothing. “Here, let me get that.” She took the cup from Kate’s hand, filling it with water. Then she took Kate’s hand and led her back to the couch. “Take a few sips,” she said as she rubbed small circles on Kate’s back.

Usually Kate fought hard to keep control during an attack, but with her sister there she surrendered—giving herself over to wave after wave of suffocating anxiety. She could feel sweat trickling down the back of her neck as terrifying visions of her attacker—the feel of his hot breath on her face as he cut off her ability to breathe—appeared in her mind, distorted and misshapen with smells and sounds repeating until she felt like throwing up.

After being attacked Kate had withdrawn, both emotionally and physically. When her medical leave ran out, she took personal leave. A few days before her personal leave ran out, her mother died. Kate knew she would never go back but it was easier to live in denial, to focus on her family tragedy and to make herself a martyr in its wake.

Kate’s thoughts spiraled out of control, but Tilly’s hand on her back kept her grounded, giving her the freedom to succumb to her out-of-control emotions without the worry that she would die. Without the fear that her body would be found too late, that this time it wasn’t just panic.

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