A Delicate Balance by Edward Albee

Author:Edward Albee [Albee, Edward]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Classics, DRA000000, DRA001000
ISBN: 9780452278097
Google: sW2qAAAAQBAJ
Amazon: B00EOARZ78
Barnesnoble: B00EOARZ78
Goodreads: 135503
Publisher: Plume
Published: 1966-01-01T05:00:00+00:00

SCENE TWO

(Same set, after dinner, the same evening AGNES and TOBIAS to one side, AGNES standing TOBIAS not; JULIA in another corner, not facing them)

JULIA

(A statement, directed to neither of them)

That was, without question, the ugliest dinner I have ever sat through.

AGNES (Seemingly pleased)

What did you say?

(No answer)

Now, what can you mean? Was the ragout not to your pleasure? Did the floating island sink? Watch what you say, for your father is proud of his wines. …

JULIA

No! You! Sitting there! Like a combination … pope, and … “We will not discuss it”; “Claire, be still”; “No, Tobias, the table is not the proper place”; “Julia!” … nanny! Like a nanny!

AGNES

When we are dealing with children …

JULIA

I must discover, sometime, who you think you are.

AGNES (Icy)

You will learn … one day.

JULIA

No, more like a drill sergeant! You will do this, you will not say that.

AGNES

“To keep in shape.” Have you heard the expression? Most people misunderstand it, assume it means alteration, when it does not. Maintenance. When we keep something in shape, we maintain its shape—whether we are proud of that shape, or not, is another matter—we keep it from falling apart. We do not attempt the impossible. We maintain. We hold.

JULIA

Yes? So?

AGNES (Quietly)

I shall … keep this family in shape. I shall maintain it; hold it.

JULIA (A sneer)

But you won’t attempt the impossible.

AGNES (A smile)

I shall keep it in shape. If I am a drill sergeant … so be it. Since nobody … really wants to talk about your latest … marital disorder, really wants to talk around it, use it as an excuse for all sorts of horrid little revenges … I think we can at least keep the table … unlittered of that.

JULIA

(Sarcastic salute, not rising though)

Yes, sir.

AGNES (Reasonable)

And, if I shout, it’s merely to be heard … above the awful din of your privacies and sulks … all of you. I am not being an ogre, am I?

TOBIAS (Not anxious to argue)

No, no; very … reasonable.

AGNES

If I am a stickler on certain points

(Just as JULIA’s mouth opens to speak)

—a martinet, as Julia would have it, would you not, sweet? in fact, were you not about to?—if I am a stickler on points of manners, timing, tact—the graces, I almost blush to call them—it is simply that I am the one member of this … reasonably happy family blessed and burdened with the ability to view a situation objectively while I am in it.

JULIA (Not really caring)

What time is it?

AGNES (A little harder now)

The double position of seeing not only facts but their implications …

TOBIAS

Nearly ten.

AGNES

(Some irritation toward both of them)

… the longer view as well as the shorter. There is a balance to be maintained, after all, though the rest of you teeter, unconcerned, or uncaring, assuming you’re on level ground … by divine right, I gather, though that is hardly so. And if I must be the fulcrum. …

(Sees neither of them is really listening, says in the same tone)

… I think I shall have a divorce.

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