30 Days of Hope for Comfort in Infertility by G. Elizabeth Evans

Author:G. Elizabeth Evans
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: New Hope Publishers
Published: 2016-01-15T00:00:00+00:00

DAY 15

EMOTIONALLY AMBUSHED

Those who plant in tears will harvest with shouts of joy. They weep as they go to plant their seed, but they sing as they return with the harvest.

—PSALM 126:5–6

EVEN during the time I so desperately wanted to experience pregnancy and childbirth, I thought I could keep my emotions reined in pretty well. I could smile when someone told me she was pregnant, even though inside I was crying. I bought baby gifts for others in hopes of one day buying them for my own child.

At times my stoic attitude did not work, and I would be flooded with emotion. For example, I could be walking through a department store and suddenly see a display with tiny baby clothes that would send me into tears. One day, as I passed a park, I saw strollers and mothers playing with young children. I realized I had tears rolling down my cheeks. Other times, I became moody for days and could not understand why until I was reminded there was a baby shower coming up that I was expected to attend. I could go on and on.

I call them ambushes because they come out of nowhere and attack you in your most vulnerable state. Like an enemy’s strategy, the purpose is to defeat you. To cause anger and jealousy. To cause you to become more impatient, to question God more, and to be swallowed up by overwhelming feelings of incompleteness and inadequacy.

God desires for you to run to Him when you encounter these ambushes. The psalmist wrote, “My heart has heard you say, ‘Come and talk with me.’ And my heart responds, ‘LORD, I am coming’” (Psalm 27:8).

Allow Him to dry your tears, calm your fears, and remove your anger and jealousy. He desires to remind you, as His precious daughter, that He has created you for His purpose and in Him you will find complete joy.

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