With Reckless Abandon by Jim Sharp

Author:Jim Sharp
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781608930166
Publisher: Down East Books

Chapter 13

Marry Me, El Capitano

What is it about the romance of the sea that drives people into marriage? The first couple that wished to be launched off the deep end of my schooner was Donna and Allen, a nice young pair from lower New England. They wanted to have El Capitano perform the ceremony dockside on Sunday and cruise aboard the following week. Of course, in those days, I’d do almost anything to land a paying passenger. So in preparation, I sent to the State of Maine for an application to solemnize marriages.

A short time later the application arrived and I sat down and carefully answered the questions, crossing out the part that said “You are an ordained minister of …. You are a Justice Of The Peace…. You are a Notary Public.” In the place of those words, I penned in, big as life, “A Master of Sailing Vessels.” I enclosed the check for four dollars per instructions, and they sent me the license — good forever! No time limit.

Blissfully, I went about my business splicing up Donna and Allen in a pleasant ceremony with lots of flowers, formal wedding attire, and a large contingent of spectators, with champagne for the wedding party including the other passengers cruising that week. The dock was crowded with the usual Sunday tourists, but that day they were rubbernecking and pushing to get a good view of the proceedings. I hauled my old blue blazer from the closet, dusted it off, and Donna and Allen were properly spliced and sailed off into the sunset with us for the next six days.

That ceremony seemed to launch a rash of marriages aboard, because it wasn’t long before I got more calls. My blazer got quite a workout with some very formal weddings and some not so formal. I even did one with the wedding party in T-shirts and tattoos and the bride-to-be, judging by the stretch marks on the sweater into which she was poured, very much closer to delivery than conception, and she, all the while, making every attempt to appear casually composed.

For ten or twelve years I continued performing weddings until suddenly I received an urgent notice from the state. It seemed some busy-body in the State House found my application and was concerned about the “Master of Sailing Vessels” part. They insisted I cease and desist the performance of all marriages. They claimed my license was invalid and, to continue, I must become a Notary Public. I needed to pay seven dollars for two years, renewable.

I decided to delve not into the validity of those fifteen or so prior ceremonies and explore not where the participants now stood in the eyes of God and country. With my fancy new credentials, I have performed an equal number of notary marriages as I did under the guise of Master of Sailing Vessels. Their number included not only a generous handful of my crew, but my mate, one of my cooks, several friends, passengers of note, and some Camden townspeople.

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