Who Killed Santa? by Unknown

Author:Unknown
Language: eng
Format: epub

“Sorry they’re so short. Don’t get too many visitors your size ‘round here. Here, drink this.” The old man thrust the massive mug towards Will, who complied automatically, receiving the drink and taking a quick sip. It had the color and constancy of tar, and slid down will’s throat with a teasing, near-erotic slowness. Its chocolate flavor was overpoweringly rich, and so sweet that it was nearly painful. Will completed the introductory sip and immediately gasped for air, his face flushed red. He could feel its warmth slowly spreading through his body. After pausing to take in the sensation of the thing, Will went for another sip, measured and slow. The drink’s intensity was not for the faint of heart, but there was a deep satisfaction to it’s daunting intensity, like that of an espresso or fine whiskey. The second sip restored color and feeling to all of Will’s near-frozen appendages (as well as imbuing in him a deep and instantaneous hatred for the Nestle corporation and all its contemporaries). By the third sip, Will had gained the strength to triumphantly spring to his feet, immediately smacking his head against the rafters and sitting back down. “Good stuff, eh?” The man inquired. This drink was no doubt the fuel behind the unparalleled factorial efficiency of the elven workforce, Will thought.

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