Understanding Sikhism by W. Owen Cole

Author:W. Owen Cole [Cole, W. Owen]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Dunedin Academic Press Ltd
Published: 2013-10-14T18:30:00+00:00

The Sikh Householder

Guru Nanak utterly rejected the varnashramadharma ideal. For him there was one varna, humanity, which included women and men; there was one ashrama, the householder stage of life; there was one dharma, obligatory upon everyone, the worship of God and the service of humanity.

A passage reproving renunciants, wandering mendicants, yogis, men of learning, ascetics and celibates, all of whom are destined to wander in transmigration, has these words of commendation for the devout family person:

Pandits, teachers and astrologers are forever reading the Puranas, They do not know that which is within. Brahman is contained in the heart. Penitents perform austerities in the forest and some even live at pilgrimage places, unenlightened they do not understand themselves. For what purpose have they become ascetics? Some by effort succeed in restraining their semen. They are called celibates after truth, and are attached to the Guru’s teaching. They hold fast to Nam, Dan and Ishnan, and remain awake in God’s meditation. (AG 418)

In supporting the householder way of life, that of a husband and wife, their children and other members of the extended family, it might be argued that the Guru was making a virtue of necessity; that most of his audience, if not all, had no alternative but to toil to live, and to eke out a poor existence at that. He was, however, doing more than face an unpleasant reality, he was affirming that the householder (gristhi/grihasta) life is ordained by God. It makes for social unity and coherence, it should, as the Guru envisaged it, find a place of equal status for man and woman, husband and wife. Bhai Gurdas, interpreting his intentions, saw the wife as a necessary counterpart to the husband and his helper in achieving spiritual liberation. It may be true also of other Indian-originating religious traditions, but it is certainly part of the Sikh way of life that young people should marry. Speaking with Sikh students about what they intend to do after graduation, almost all of them say that their parents are looking for a suitable match. An unemployed, highly qualified Sikh divorcee was asked whether she might contemplate going back to India where she would easily have obtained a chair in her chosen discipline. She replied, ‘Not until I’m too old for my parents to look for another husband for me’. Obviously, there are Sikhs who never marry, but the ideal norm is that partners should be found for women and men.

Against the tendency to renounce the world Guru Nanak taught:

Remain in towns and near the main high roads, but be alert. Do not covet your neighbour’s possessions. Without Nam we cannot attain inner peace or still our inner hunger. The Guru has shown me that the real life of the city, the real life of its shops, is the inner life. We must be traders in truth, moderate in our eating and sleeping. That is true yoga. (AG 939)

As the above passage states, there is such a thing as householder ethics – moderation in all things is how it might be expressed.

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