The Way Out by Vicki Jarrett

Author:Vicki Jarrett
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Freight Books

Ladies’ Day

A wet, gusty wind barges across the race track. The women, the ladies, are woefully exposed to the elements in thin dresses that flick and snap around goose-bumped fake tan, not a coat to be seen, clinging on to head gear, reinserting clips and pins, trying to hold it all together. Three of us from the baby group – me, Kaz and Ashley – shelter behind a bookies’ booth.

‘Remind me again why we’re here,’ says Ashley, leaning on my shoulder for balance as she picks a wad of muddy grass from the heel of her stiletto.

Kaz glares at her. ‘We’re here to have a day off. We’re going to have fun, right?’ She scowls at the two of us until we nod agreement. ‘Anyway, the tickets cost a bomb so at least pretend like you are.’

Ashley examines the muddy streaks on her fingers. ‘I need a drink,’ she says.

I give her a baby-wipe from the packet in my bag.

I should’ve phoned Kaz and said I’d got a cold, or Sean’s shifts had been changed at the last minute. Something. Anything.

Sean had come up behind me as I fiddled with my hair in the hall mirror. ‘Mmhmm. Looking good,’ he said, wrapped his arms around my waist and pressed in against my back. His hands travelled upwards as he nuzzled into my neck.

I steadied myself against the wall. I’m not used to heels so my balance wasn’t great to start with. I peeled his fingers off and wriggled out of his grip.

‘Thanks, that really helps.’ I tried a laugh to soften the sarcasm in my voice but it came out bent. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. My reflection frowned at us both from the mirror.

‘What?’ The mirror-Sean raised his open palms behind me. ‘Well, you look sexy,’ he pretend huffed, stepping back.

‘No I don’t. I look like someone’s mum.’

The dress was bought for a wedding last year and was supposed to be floaty to blur the edges of my post-baby figure, but it just hung on me like a worn-out flowery dishcloth.

Sean smiled. ‘You are someone’s mum, pet.’

‘I know that.’ There was that irritability again, showing through like a spot under too much concealer. ‘I meant someone older. Someone… else.’

A moment of silence opened up and out of it poured this sadness, like the sky had just emptied straight down on me. The anger washed away but I was drenched, the stupid dress drooping and dripping. I jerked in a breath and blinked a couple of times. Sean squeezed my shoulder and for a second I thought maybe he understood but I didn’t have time to find out because there was a cry from upstairs. We both froze and tilted our heads to listen. A couple more whimpers and then silence. We looked at each other and nodded.

I went back to jabbing at my hair clips. Had I done them right? We were all supposed to have hats for today and I did try but hats make me look fake.

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