The Shadow King by Sidra Stone PhD

Author:Sidra Stone, PhD
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781608681488
Publisher: New World Library

The Good Daughter

The classical Good Daughter knows the rules and expectations of the outer patriarchy, and for her survival she is finely tuned in to the voice of her own Inner Patriarch. She listens to these rules, and she behaves accordingly. She knows how to live in a mans world without making trouble for herself or for the men around her. It is quite possible for her to achieve success both personally and professionally, but she does this in an “appropriate” fashion.

Marnie was a typical Good Daughter. She worked hard at school and followed all the rules. She was a high achiever and did very well on her examinations and written assignments. Marnie was careful about her image, however, and she never spoke up in class if there were males present. Her mother, passing on the rules of her own Inner Patriarch, had taught Marnie when she was quite young not to be too clever when there were males around. This would make them uncomfortable, and that would not do. One should never make a male uncomfortable with your expertise, power, or intelligence; it was just not done.

Marnie truly wanted to be a good person and to please her mother. She also wanted to be accepted by others and hoped to get married some day. She saw many women who were successful but alone, and she did not wish to be one of them. Her mother was married and obviously knew how to be attractive to men. So Marnie listened to her mother’s teaching and was extremely cautious about showing her own intelligence or power. By the time she reached adolescence, Marnie did not have to be reminded about anything; her own Inner Patriarch knew the rules and would automatically rein her in whenever it seemed as though Marnie might move beyond the realm of good daughter and demand too much attention, power, or respect.

Actually Marnie’s Inner Patriarch did know how to “handle” men. He coached her in how to be a good girl, in manipulation, and in all sorts of “womanly wiles.” He told her how men felt and what they expected, and she was able to behave accordingly. She knew the rules of the game and followed them. Although Marnie lived life as a good daughter, she did not feel particularly exploited. After all, the rules were just the rules. When Marnie was with men, they felt good about themselves and they liked her. Interactions were comfortable, nonconfrontational, and smooth.

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