The Last Noël (NHB Modern Plays) by Chris Bush

Author:Chris Bush [Bush, Chris]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781788502986
Publisher: Nick Hern Books

Song: ‘Five Gold Rings’

ON THE FIRST DAY OF CHRISTMAS

MY TRUE LOVE SENT TO ME

A MILE-A-MINUTE FESTIVE

MISSING-PERSON MYSTERY

AND I KNOW NOBODY’S NUPTIALS

ARE EVER ALL STRESS-FREE

BUT I’M SWEATING LIKE A SNOWMAN

WHEN IT’S THIRTY-FIVE DEGREES

(FIVE GOLD RINGS!)

JUST FIVE MINUTES MORE

I SWEAR THAT’S ALL I NEED

(FIVE GOLD RINGS!)

JUST FIVE MINUTES MORE

NOW BRING IT HOME TO ME

We race down to The Star and hammer on the door. Eventually, begrudgingly, someone answers. Not Gabriella’s brother-inlaw, but the other owner, a formidable matriarch by the name of Denise, who tells us to get lost, don’t we read English, and they don’t start serving breakfast till eleven. We explain the situation, but it does little to soften her. Transpires she does remember them, and that isn’t necessarily a good thing, because they most certainly outstayed their welcome. Now The Star does have a small number of rooms above the pub, and they’d wanted to crash there, but they were too messy and too many at this point, and so… there was no room at the inn.

TESS. Oh God, that’s awful.

MIKE. Quiet. And so, in the early hours of the morning they’d been sent packing again. Denise points us in the vague direction she thinks they went, which at first doesn’t seem like much help, but then it hits me. I know exactly where she is. I’ve cracked it – I’m going to find my sister.

ON THE FIRST DAY OF WEDLOCK

IT’S NEVER A GOOD SIGN

WHEN THE BRIDE-TO-BE IS NOWHERE TO BE SEEN

AND THE GROOM RAIDS THE CHURCH

FOR COMMUNION WINE

THERE’S WORK TO DO BUT I PROMISE YOU

IT’S ALL GOING TO BE FINE

GET OUT MY FACE BUT I’M ON THE CASE

AND WE’RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME

(FIVE GOLD RINGS!)

JUST FIVE MINUTES MORE

BEFORE THE BELLS WILL CHIME

(FIVE GOLD RINGS!)

JUST FIVE MINUTES MORE

FOR THE FATES TO REALIGN

Important things to know about Gail, other than the fact that she’s a sloppy drunk and an absolute liability – she has a lot of love to give. She has love for all living creatures, and before she started healing humans, she had a borderline obsession with helping animals. This passion blossomed at a small city farm a stone’s throw from our parents’ house, where she used to volunteer and spend every spare waking moment. If she was ever stressed, or upset, or anxious or just needed to surround herself with a feeling of love and safety and familiarity that is where she’d go – to the farm, to the stables, to the donkeys and the sheep and the cattle a-lowing. And would you believe it, but that farm lies in the very same direction Denise from The Star pointed us.

ON THE FIRST DAY OF CHRISTMAS

I’LL GIVE YOU IF I MAY

MY SWEET HUNGOVER SISTER

WHO’S BEEN SLEEPING IN THE HAY

AND I’M SURE SHE STILL FEELS LIKE THE ASS

UP TO THIS VERY DAY

BUT NO TIME TO TEASE, COME WITH ME PLEASE

BECAUSE WE CAN’T DELAY

(FIVE GOLD RINGS!)

HEAR THE BELLS RING OUT

COS IT’S YOUR WEDDING DAY

(FIVE GOLD RINGS!)

WE’RE THE THREE WISE MEN

AND WE DIDN’T COME TO PLAY

She’s curled up amongst the hay

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.