The Juggler by Rachilde

Author:Rachilde [Rachilde]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: New Brunswick : Rutgers University Press
Published: 1990-11-15T00:00:00+00:00

pleasing, look for another who responds better to your aspirations . . . worldly or theatrical.

"What the devil, I'll undertake to look for him for you willingly! I even prefer this last alternative, I'll choose with the greatest discernment! There's the memory of your husband? If you think they're all like him! No! All men are not crippled. Your husband (if he wasn't already dead, poor man, I would go and wring his neck with pleasure) needed to supplement the insufficiency of his . . . plastic with an overflowing of passion which I would dare qualify as criminal, despite my great distrust of big words. They are rudely depraved, his little wax Eliantes . . . and their elder sister is much too chaste. He has unbalanced the character of a loving woman, he has killed the taste for happiness in you, to replace it with an appetite for renunciation. Unless . . .

"I love you! You're right. You're right slowly, little by little, the way a bird builds its nest . . .

"And you are making your nest in my reason, I feel you pulling off a piece of wool here, a thread of silk there, one of my hairs further on. . . . You will pull everything off! Soon I'll be a little child naked in the strong winter wind . . . and no woman, ugly or beautiful, will want to warm me up in the folds of her skirt!

"You are right because what we ask of the mistresses of our twenty-two years is a little more than sexual appeasement. If you had given yourself the first evening, the next day I would have had the sadness of thinking that ... it was all the same, at the same time having the normal desire to start all over again . . . to be finished faster. At present, everything went well with others . . . the only one I want is you, not for one night, but for the only night of unique love, the one that covers the whole earth with one beat of its black wing. I don't know if I love you really, but I would like to die in your arms

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