The Islamist: Why I Joined Radical Islam in Britain, What I Saw Inside and Why I Left by Ed Husain

Author:Ed Husain [Husain, Ed]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
ISBN: 9780141041124
Publisher: Penguin Books Ltd
Published: 2015-12-02T16:00:00+00:00

9. Farewell Fanaticism

The facts of history are nothing; interpretation is everything.

E. H. Carr, British historian

Just as I had become a member of the Hizb over a period of time, my departure from the organization did not occur on a specific date. Attraction and commitment to extremism have always been part of a gradual process. My first move away was to dissociate myself from the halaqah, a move prompted by the taking of an innocent life, Omar Bakri’s subsequent deceit and my horror when I realized how poisonous was the atmosphere I had helped create. Most important of these was the murder – the Hizb’s ideas had led to the belief that the life of a kafir was of little consequence in attaining Muslim dominance. I could not bear to be associated with such ideas any longer. I was frightened of where they might lead. Did I really want to follow a credo that led to violence and murder? I had advocated the ideas of Muslim domination, confrontation, and jihad, never for one moment thinking that their catastrophic consequences would arrive on my own doorstep. It had all seemed abstract and remote, relevant for Bosnia or the Middle East, not Britain.

Now I began to wonder whether Islam had anything at all to offer. I had completely confused Islamism with Islam: to me they were the same. Did God really want government in the name of religion? I had serious doubts. If God was on the Muslim side then why had we failed to establish the Islamic state? Why were the ‘enemies of God’, as we viewed the West, politically dominant?

I wanted to find out, and the only way to do so would be to learn Arabic so that I could read the Koran and classical Muslim sources for myself. Had I been duped by both Jamat-e-Islami and Hizb ut-Tahrir in their deployment of Arabic? Like many Muslims, I had learnt from a young age how to read and pronounce Arabic words, but I had no idea what those words meant. What I did not realize was that even in trying to set my mind free, I was taking steps that Islamists take: going direct to divine text without scholarly guidance, believing that I, with the mere understanding of a language, could interpret what Muslim scholars have debated and discussed for centuries.

All the while Faye’s companionship and love helped me to maintain my composure. We spoke about the Hizb for hours and there was no doubt that she preferred me out of the Hizb than in. I told her about the arguments I had had with my father and that similar tension existed between nearly all Hizb activists and their parents. Faye reminded me of one of Islam’s most basic teachings: be kind to your mother and father. ‘How could people in the Hizb reject their parents so easily? Don’t they know about the man who wanted to go on a military expedition and the Prophet said that looking after elderly parents

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