The Cosmo Report by Linda Wolfe

Author:Linda Wolfe [Wolfe, Linda]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Social Science, General
ISBN: 9780877953159
Google: U-WFAAAAIAAJ
Publisher: Arbor House
Published: 1981-01-15T04:05:47+00:00

5. What Do You Fantasize About?

Despite differences in their specific details, sexual fantasies tend to be alike. There are only a limited number of fantasy themes and they occur with surprising regularity.

Typically, people fantasize not only about particular types of partners (numerous partners, strangers, same-sex partners), and particular types of activities (sadomasochistic activities, oral-genital contact, anal intercourse and intercourse itself), but also about being with their fantasy partners and performing their fantasized acts under certain particular kinds of circumstances. These circumstances consist of such situations as being observed, observing others, being forced, forcing others.

The Cosmo survey did not poll women concerning their most frequent fantasy circumstances. But many women volunteered this information. The fantasy circumstances most commonly reported involved: being observed prior to or during sex, and being forced to have sex. (These two types of fantasies were, incidentally, also the most frequent fantasy circumstances reported in the David Sue study of college women: of those college women who fantasized during sex, over half fantasized about forced sex, and a third fantasized about being observed.)

Among the Cosmo women, observation fantasies were sometimes blunt, as in the three fantasies that follow:

I fantasize while I am masturbating or having sex with my husband that someone else is present. Someone is watching me from the shadows, or through the keyhole, or from outside the window.

—a 25-year-old Virginia woman

My lover is going down on me in front of a circle of men who are all watching. I don’t know any of them, although my lover does. Each of the men has an erection and my lover asks me to perform fellatio on them, one by one, and then, in the end, on him.

—a 29-year-old nurse from Maine

I love to fantasize that I am doing a strip on a table in a nightclub. The men in the audience go wild. They press around the table where I’m standing and want to have wild sex with me.

—a 27-year old California woman

But some observation fantasies were elaborate, with settings and story lines resembling those in romantic gothic novels or old-time costume movies:

I have a repetitive fantasy about a burly, muscular man who is somehow very important. A king or a nobleman. What happens is that for some reason he picks me for his lover. He has many servants, mostly women, and he orders them to prepare me to have sex with him. I am bathed, massaged, powdered and perfumed, all of the servants commenting on me as they prepare me. Then I am dressed in a thin satin slip and placed on satin sheets, awaiting the man’s arrival. At last he comes. The servants drift into the corners. I am aware that they are still there, observing me, and am a little uneasy about their presence, but when the man touches me, I melt under his strong hands, and we drift off into heaven.

—a 23-year-old graduate student from Chicago

I live back in the time of Scarlett O’Hara and Rhett Butler. My father is very rich. We live on a horse farm, and there are plenty of handsome young ranch hands.

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