Surviving Suicide Bereavement by McManus SJ Brendan;McManus Brendan;

Author:McManus SJ, Brendan;McManus, Brendan;
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: RELIGION / Christian Living / General
Publisher: Messenger Publications

Are they in Hell?

‘Is my brother in Hell?’ are the most chilling words from a family member that stay with me from the funeral. Worry about negative religious consequences and eternal punishment for the person is par for the course and needs to be addressed. Some theological assistance and pastoral guidance is helpful here, in many cases old theological attitudes and negative ‘divine’ judgments revolve around suicide survivors.15 Unfortunately it is still the case that feelings of shame and social stigma can prevent many people from getting the support they need, particularly getting free of guilt.

It is true that without the insights of modern psychology, suicide was seen in a harsh way (eternal damnation). However, the New Catechism of the Catholic Church has a helpful statement: ‘Grave psychological disturbances, anguish, or grave fear of hardship, suffering, or torture can diminish the responsibility of the one committing suicide. We should not despair of the eternal salvation of persons who have taken their own lives.16’ The role of depression17, so obvious in the case of my brother, was clearly a major contributor for this self-destructive act that largely reduced his responsibility and therefore the implication of serious mortal sin. I believe that anyone who takes their life is not in their right mind and normally is acting under extreme mental anguish.

Technically, for a sin to be mortal (meriting damnation) the act of taking one’s own life has to meet three conditions18: it must be a grave or serious issue; the person must know that this is wrong; and the person must intentionally consent to this action. In many cases of suicide, the person is not in their right mind to give full consent. Recent studies highlight the social and personal circumstances in suicides and show that they are rarely voluntary acts and so, while they may be mistaken and morally wrong, they are not always blameworthy. Fear, pressure, ignorance, addiction, and psychological problems can impede the exercise of the will so that a person may not be fully responsible for an action. While suicide can be judged immoral, the degree of responsibility for suicide depends upon the state of the person’s mind.

Think of a fire emergency in a tower block where desperate people are forced to jump out windows to escape the inferno. They don’t want to die, but have no choice as they are in an intolerably extreme situation. Similarly in suicide, the person’s mind is in such a state of chaos and frenzy that they want to escape it at all costs, even if it means destroying themselves. The internal agony caused by the ‘fire’ of negativity, ruminations and self-hate can never be underestimated.

The Irish Catholic Bishops adopt a similar line: ‘While we believe that God is the giver of life, and he alone has the right to decide when that life should end we also realise that God can look deep within the human heart, recognise its difficulties, understand and forgive.’19 Helpful as these sources are, it is still

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