Shy by Ashish Rastogi

Shy by Ashish Rastogi

Author:Ashish Rastogi
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: LGBTQIA+, athlete, interracial, sports, coming out, in the closet, rugby, badminton, gay, India
Publisher: NineStar Press, LLC
Published: 2022-10-29T00:00:00+00:00


Chapter Eighteen

Flight turbulence

SAARANSH

“Why are you going to Copenhagen?” The immigration officer scans my passport.

“For a tournament.” Immigration officials anywhere in the world remind me of my math teacher in school. I dreaded Mrs. Mathews’s classes. Even when asking simple questions, her face remained stern.

Once the officer stamps my passport, I wait for Coach Sir’s process to be completed before moving to grab some food. Despite my sunglasses, people stare. The camera’s come up at random as people snap pictures on our long walk to the food court at T3 Delhi International Airport. The boarding is in another two hours, giving me ample time to relax and stretch my legs before the cattle class ride for the next sixteen hours.

“You are becoming popular.” Mr. Parthasarathy beams with pride. “Imagine what will happen once you win the Denmark Open and become the world number one.”

I don’t mind the popularity. For me, one aspect of playing is entertaining the crowd. Win or lose, spectators should get their money’s worth of adrenaline high. But when strangers walk into my personal space, ooh, the creeps. At the food court, we grab a coffee and take a seat near one of the display boards to monitor our flight.

“Oye, hoye!” A group of five men to my right is rambunctious. Must be drunk. They are wearing maroon T-shirts with some company logo. A lanky guy with salt-pepper hair in the group recognizes me. He moves closer to one of his mates and whispers. The round-bellied balding teammate turns toward me and sniggers, raising a middle finger. He pumps the finger into a ring formed with his other hand. The rest of the men guffaw. Heads turn, making me the center of everyone’s attention.

My Olympic coach is no better. Instead of standing up for me, he moves closer and whispers, “Ignore them.”

“Why? Can’t you see what they are doing?”

“Saaransh, calm down.” Mr. Parthasarathy plays cool while my body is burning with rage.

“Calm down. Why? They have no right to mock me.”

“This is what people think of you. I told you before. This gay business can be cured. You should be focused on your game, not on the sexual depravity.”

I am shocked. “No. There are no doctors for such things. My sexual orientation is not a disease to cure with a pill. No surgery to remove a part of my brain will change me. So please, for the love of god, stop this damn nonsense.”

My heart thumps hard in my chest. Head throbs. “I will catch up with you at the entry gate.” I grab my things and scram. I need to get away from Mr. Parthasarathy before I do something I will regret for the rest of my life.

Hoots and laughter follow me down the stairs. I head to the nearest restroom, take a last sip of the bitterness before dumping the coffee, and lock myself inside the vacant toilet stall, resting my head on the door. Breathe, Saar, breathe. The air leaves my pursed lips in low-pitched rasps.



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