Revenge of the Lawn, The Abortion, So the Wind Won't Blow it All Away by Richard Brautigan

Author:Richard Brautigan [Brautigan, Richard]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt (www.hmhco.com)

Blank like Snow

WHILE Foster went into the library to welcome his first book, Vida and I continued lying there on the bed taking little nips from the bottle of whiskey he had graciously left behind. After a while Vida and I were so relaxed that we both could have been rented out as fields of daisies.

Suddenly, we had lost track of time, Foster came slamming into the room. He was very angry in his overweight T-shirt sweating kind of way.

"I think we'd better close this nuthouse while you're south," he said, demanding whiskey with his right hand. "Come to think of it, we should close this God-damn place forever. Everybody go home. Pick up their marbles. That is, if they have any left."

Foster gobbled down a big turkey slug of whiskey. He grimaced and shook when it hit his stomach. "That's better," he said, wiping his hand across his mouth.

"What happened?" Vida said. "It looks like your library vaccination didn't take."

"You're telling me. More whiskey!" Foster said, addressing the bottle as if it were a healing hand of balm.

"I hope you didn't frighten them," I said. "That's not the purpose of this library. It's a service, not a demand that we perform here."

"Frighten them? Are you kidding, kid? It was the other God-damn way around. Hell, I usually get along with people."

"What happened?" Vida repeated.

"Well, I went out there and it wasn't exactly who I expected would be there. I mean, they were standing outside and—"

"Who was it?" Vida said.

"A woman?" I said, a little mercilessly.

"It's not important," Foster said. "Let me continue, damn it! Yes, there was a woman out there and I use the word woman with serious reservation. She was ringing the bell and she had a book under her arm, so I opened the door. That was a mistake."

"What did she look like?" I said.

"It's not important," Foster said.

"Come on," Vida said. "Tell us."

Ignoring us, Foster continued telling the story in his own manner, "When I opened the door she opened her mouth at the same time. 'Who are you?' she demanded to know in a voice just like a car wreck. What the hell!

"'I'm Foster,' I said.

"'You don't look like any Foster I've ever seen,' she said. 'I think you're somebody else because you're no Foster.'

"'That's my name,' I said. 'I've always been Foster.'

"'Haa! but enough of you. Where's my mother?' she demanded.

"'What do you mean, your mother? You're too old to have a mother,' I said. I was tired of humoring the bag.

"'What do you want done with that book?' I said.

"'That's none of your God-damn business, you impostor Foster. Where's she at?'

"'Good night,' I said.

"'What do you mean, good night? I'm not going anywhere. I'm staying right here until you tell me about my mother.'

"'I don't know where your mother is and frankly, to quote Clark Gable in Gone with the Wind, "I don't give a damn."'

"'Call my mother Clark Gable!' she said, and then she tried to slap me. Well, that was

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.