Renewal for the Wounded Warrior by R. Loren Sandford

Author:R. Loren Sandford
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Baker Publishing Group
Published: 2010-02-01T00:00:00+00:00

8

LINGERING QUESTIONS

How Long Will My Recovery Take?

Speed of recovery depends on a number of factors. How healthy were you before you sank into burnout? How strong is your general makeup, both physically and emotionally? What kind of support systems are available to you to aid and assist in your healing? What kinds of pressures continue to drain your energy? Is good counsel available? Under any circumstances, recovery is usually a lengthy sojourn. It takes months or even years for the deeply burned out to return fully to strength, so prepare yourself emotionally for an extended process. You have expended resources that cannot easily be replaced and you must give yourself time to rebuild them.

Will I Recover Completely?

Yes and no. You may never fully recover the level of intensity, strength and resilience you enjoyed before you burned out. Unfortunately, you have squandered an only partially renewable resource and you will henceforth and forever be compelled to measure your limited strength against the size of the tasks that come your way. You will have gained wisdom more valuable and more life giving than the resources you lost. You may, therefore, actually become more productive with less expenditure of energy than you thought possible. You will discover that you are much less easily thrown off balance emotionally. Your sense of perspective will be razor sharp.

What about Relapses?

You will probably experience many relapses in the course of your recovery. For a long time, if I overextended myself for too long a period, I would suddenly feel completely undone, as if there had been no recovery at all. Such episodes mean little. Rest and a stronger sense of perspective provide the cure.

For a while you may feel like a bouncing ball, sometimes descending to the depths of your former despair, sometimes bouncing out and flying high. Or you may descend to stage one and then recover quickly, only to plunge to the very bottom a week later. Having done so, you may awaken the next morning wondering what the whole thing was about, after all, because you feel so wonderful once more. Remember that recovery takes time and that temporary relapses are part of the process.

What If My Mate Will Not Stop Putting Pressure on Me to Perform When I Can’t?

This is not an uncommon problem, especially for female victims! Too many husbands fail to understand the condition, thinking it is all nonsense and denying that it even exists. Because of this they continue making selfish physical and emotional demands of her, condemning her if she cannot produce, and ultimately placing her in danger of serious breakdown. This can happen to men, as well, but the victims of this kind of misunderstanding are most often women.

Much of my answer to this question was included in chapter 7, but I will add one more dimension here. As a last resort, when a mate refuses to come to terms with your needs, a temporary separation may be in order until you have had time to regain your strength and balance.

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