Out of the Doghouse: A Step-by-Step Relationship-Saving Guide for Men Caught Cheating by Robert Weiss

Author:Robert Weiss [Weiss, Robert]
Language: eng
Format: azw3
Tags: Doghouse, relationship, Dog, cheating, Out of the Doghouse, Robert Weiss, step, saving, guide, men, caught
Publisher: Health Communications, Inc.
Published: 2017-01-02T16:00:00+00:00

Regardless of your current indecision, if you ask for time to sort things out, then you absolutely must stop cheating. Completely and totally. Right now. You just flat out cannot tell your spouse that you are putting your relationship with her on temporary hold so you can clear your head and then continue to engage in infidelity. That is something she will never forgive. Never. So don’t do it.

It is also important to note that your affair partner may be just as unhappy as your spouse about this requested time-out. If so, your approach with her should be the same as with your mate. Ask for time apart so you can clear your head and make a good decision. Whatever you do, do not lie to her about time you’re spending with your spouse. And don’t lie about anything else, either. In other words, don’t tell your affair partner that you’re planning to leave your marriage so you can be with her, unless you have unequivocally made up your mind to do so (and have considered this decision for a few days or weeks to be certain).

Decision Time

Regardless of whether your infidelity was casual or emotionally connected, there are three primary considerations: the past, the present, and the future. If your infidelity was entirely casual and you feel no emotional connection to your extracurricular sex partner(s), these considerations apply only to your significant other. If, however, you’re in a long-term affair with a woman you care about, both relationships must be examined.

If you find yourself comparing one relationship to another, as you are likely to do with an emotionally connected affair, you need to understand that this is not an apples to apples comparison. It’s more like apples to cookies. In other words, your fourteen-year marriage with two kids is not comparable to your relationship with a hot twenty-five-year-old who thinks everything you do is magical. These are just entirely different things. With your primary partner you have a history, home, family, friends, intermingled finances, standing in the community, and all sorts of roles and responsibilities. With your affair partner you have the excitement of illicit sex but little of the rest. You’ve likely never had to mow her lawn, pay her bills, take out her garbage, pick up groceries on your way home after a long day at work, live with her bad moods, or take care of her when she’s ill. So, as I said, it’s apples versus cookies.

Looking at Your Past

As you work on making your decision, start by thinking about your history with your long-term partner—and make sure you don’t rewrite it just because she’s incredibly pissed off and unpleasant right now. After all, you’re the one who cheated, and that’s why she’s so upset, so put that aside and look at life with your significant other before you sullied the relationship and earned your little trip to the doghouse. Ask yourself the following:

What qualities attracted me to her in the first place (beyond her

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