Of Thee I Zing: America's Cultural Decline From Muffin Tops to Body Shots by Laura Ingraham

Author:Laura Ingraham
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: General, Non-fiction, C429, Political Ideologies, Extratorrents, American Government, Politics, Political Science, Executive Branch, Writing, Conservatism & Liberalism, Humour, Kat
Publisher: Threshold Editions
Published: 2012-05-01T03:45:11+00:00

Last year I attended a neighborhood child’s final soccer game of the season. The little boy played his heart out and scored three goals during the game. The boy clearly outperformed every one on the field. After the game, as the kids downed punch and Cheetos, the coach presented the awards. The little boy was thrilled when his name was called. He leapt forward to claim the brass trophy topped by a spinning soccer ball. He hugged his mother and high-fived his dad. Then the coach called the name of every other child on the team, giving each one the exact same award. The little boy threw his trophy on the ground and asked his mother if they could leave.

It has become routine for schools to confer awards on everyone. Now, this may build self-esteem, but it also renders the awards meaningless. Some schools do the same thing at field days. After competing, all the kids receive awards for “participating.” Unless you are deployed by the U.S. military, you should not receive a medal for just showing up. This is a deeply unfair practice, because it negates achievement and extinguishes initiative. It sends the message that no matter what you do, the outcome is the same. The kid who sits on the sidelines playing his Nintendo DS will get the same award as the kid hustling to make the goal. It is an atrocious life lesson for young people. Wait until they try to get into college—we’ll see how that approach works out for them.

Grammarians at the Gate

I have read the writing of scads of recent college graduates. They often send me letters seeking employment, copies of articles from college papers, etc. One thing emerges from my encounters with their writing: somehow, they managed to get through seventeen years of education without learning the difference between “there” and “their.” (For the record, “there” indicates place. “Their” indicates possession.) The grammatical slips among college grads (and too many of their elders) are legion and now widely accepted.

So I take it upon myself to inform them that “loose” and “lose” are not interchangeable. Neither are “your” and “you’re” (one indicates possession, and the other is a contraction for “you are”). With apologies to Justice Sonia Sotomayor, “imminent” and “eminent” are also not equivalent. And don’t even get me started on “its” and “it’s.”

Speaking to these college grads is even more distressing than reading their drivel. “Me and Harry just got back from the Hill…” No, no, no. “Me and Harry,” despite the common usage by certain politicians and their wives, is always incorrect. It can only be “Harry and I.” Period. I’m considering making Strunk & White mandatory reading for anyone seeking employment, or even visiting my office. If perchance any of these grammatical slipups make their way into the copy of this book, it’s the copy-editor’s fault.

Dirty Dancing Is Tame

Young people have, for several decades, danced in a suggestive manner. The Twist, the Bump, and countless other dances were considered risqué in their time.

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