Maternity Leave by Trish Felice Cohen

Author:Trish Felice Cohen [Cohen, Trish Felice]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Gay & Lesbian
ISBN: 9781594933400
Publisher: Bella Books
Published: 2013-02-28T23:00:00+00:00

* * *

The Crab Shack was located a mile past the end of the Gandy Bridge connecting Tampa and St. Petersburg. In the mile between the bridge and the restaurant, cars that looked like they were tailgating lined the highway along both sides of the road. Technically, these people were on “the beach.” However, if they drove twenty more minutes, they would be treated to a real beach instead of the Redneck Riviera, which was essentially three inches of sand on either side of a six lane highway.

While we were on a bench at the restaurant waiting to be seated, a man in baggy jeans, white T-shirt, diamond earrings, chain necklace and a sleeve of tattoos sat next to me. I immediately pulled my purse closer and away from the thug. Jason, on the other hand, walked up to him and said, “Hey man, where’d you get that fade done up at?” My head almost fell off my neck as I turned around.

The thug said, “Huh?”

Jason repeated himself, “Fuck’n, where’d you get that fade done up at n’shit?”

“Fade Masters,” tattoo man grunted.

“That’s where I go,” Jason said. “Who do you see?”

It turned out that Jason and the thug both got their haircuts, or “fades,” done up on Nebraska Avenue by Big Tony. I think Jason might have the most street cred of his entire confirmation class at synagogue.

In hindsight, all-you-can-eat crab legs for $9.99 was not a good idea. The inevitable gastrointestinal distress followed like clockwork. I was unable to move further than seven inches from my toilet the next morning when Sarah called.

“Where are you?” she asked.

“Home shitting mud. You?”

“What?” Sarah said.

“I won’t be in today. What do you need?” I asked.

“I just wanted to tell you that I told Tony you’d meet him tonight.”

“Sarah, I can’t meet him tonight, I’m ill.”

“Fine, tomorrow night?”

“I can’t, I’m going away for a week for work and I need to get packed, set up dog care and a bunch of other things. Can I meet him when I get back next week?”

“Okay, but you have to go out with him. You’ll thank me, trust me.”

“Yes, Sarah, I’m excited to meet Tony. I can’t wait until next week.”

That bought me a week, but I didn’t see any way out of the Tony date.

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