Making Thoughtful Decisions: Finding Balance with Extra-Curricular Activities for Your Child, Your Family, and You by Jane Sanford

Author:Jane Sanford
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Publisher: 681 Publishing
Published: 2023-03-16T07:00:00+00:00

Choices and Non-Negotiables

Now that you have some guiding thoughts on your child’s developmental stage, you’ve considered your family’s overall schedule and set a budget for activities; it’s time to look at the choices. There are several ways to find out what types of activities are available in your area. For the non-competitive sports teams or individual lessons, checking the local parks and rec offerings is a great place to start. The classes are usually only a few weeks long and reasonably priced. Keep in mind that these are introductory in nature and may or may not be led by a highly skilled person. In smaller communities, the local school district may offer developmental sports leagues for elementary-aged students at a very reasonable price and have the benefit of sometimes being led by the school coaching staff with the support of high school students. This can be a great way to get to know more parents and children in the community. Many towns have Facebook groups or websites that make it much easier to locate schedules and even see some pictures of past activities to help you get a feel for the tone and popularity. The school physical education teacher and the counselor can also be a source for local activities. Having a conversation with your child well before the sign-up time and again shortly before the sign-up time is a good idea.

My youngest was 5 when we began talking to him in the winter about playing baseball in the spring. His older brother had played, so he had some exposure to the game. He was enthusiastic about playing and wanted to sign up. We waited until a couple of weeks before the deadline and talked to him again. This time he was adamantly against it. He had no interest in baseball and didn’t want to play. We were a little surprised but let it go. The day after the deadline, he came home from school excited to play baseball with his friends. We reminded him that he had decided not to sign up. He was heartbroken. We made the embarrassing parent move of calling the program director and asking if it was too late for him to get on a team. It was. He was disappointed but played the following year. Never underestimate the pull of choosing an activity to be with friends.

Conversations—have many of them over several weeks leading up to decision time if you can. Children change their minds or don’t have enough exposure to know whether they are interested. Include some conversations with a few close friends as well. The final choice rests with you, but your child should be on board or understand why you are signing them up, especially for a non-negotiable activity such as swimming lessons. As I mentioned before, I was lucky that my children enjoyed the water and wanted to do swimming lessons, but that would have been an example of something I would have told them they need to learn, so they will be taking a minimum number of classes.

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