JUDE: Lords of Carnage MC by Daphne Loveling

Author:Daphne Loveling [Loveling, Daphne]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2021-06-08T16:00:00+00:00

16

Lila

Jude’s lips on mine are gentle at first. But the heat of his skin is scorching. My breath hitches in my throat, and the sound does something to him, because he groans deeply and deepens the kiss, his tongue finding mine.

I’ll be honest about something: I’ve only been kissed once before. And that was when I was fourteen. And you best believe that kiss from Eddie Tokheim was nothing — nothing — like this. It’s like fire, I think dizzily as my mouth responds to his. Like flames inside me. They lick lower and lower as the kiss gets more intense, and a pressure starts building between my legs that’s not like anything I’ve felt before.

I’ve skirted around the edges of desire, sure — had the occasional crush on a boy in school. And to be honest, I had a crush on Jude, too, once upon a time. Not that I ever let him see it. I don’t like to show the world the things I want. I’m careful like that. When you display your needs on your face, it’s just an invitation to others to hurt you. To use the knowledge to burrow inside you — find the weak points, the sensitive, bruised parts of you — and push and prod until you’re at their mercy.

But this desire — this want, all-consuming and desperate — is like being in the center of an inferno. It’s danger itself. And as the heat laps at me, licking at my skin and burning me from the inside, the desire mounts inside me simultaneously with another rising emotion: Fear. Fear of how vulnerable and open this neediness makes me. A moan rips from my throat, and as I hear it, astonished to know it came from me, the fear gets sharper and more acute: Panic.

Gasping, I break the kiss and push desperately at Jude’s chest. He immediately lets me go, pulling back to gaze at me with a dazed expression.

“You okay, Liles?” Jude’s voice is hoarse, thick. His eyes are darker than the night sky around us. I suck in a giant lungful of air. As though I was drowning underwater, and broke the surface just in time.

“Lila?” Jude says again, his eyebrows knitting in concern.

My eyes trace the outline of Jude’s jaw, so familiar but still so mesmerizing.

I’ve told Jude my deepest fears. I’ve told him more about me than anyone else knows. I’ve kissed him, and let him crack open the door of my need.

I’m terrified that if I let this go any further, he’ll see even deeper inside me.

“Let’s head back,” I manage to say.

Jude exhales. “You good?”

“Sure. It’s just been a long day. I’m tired,” I lie. I toss my head — a reflex to displace the mass of hair that’s no longer there — and give him my best, most practiced smirk.

The lines between Jude’s brows deepen. He looks like he’s got something to say. I pray deep down that he won’t. Finally, he gives me a brief nod and gets to his feet.

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