Every Single Step by Charmaine Shettlesworth

Author:Charmaine Shettlesworth
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Stone Cold Publishing House
Published: 2022-01-26T00:00:00+00:00

Regaining My Focus

Regaining My Focus

Summer came and went quickly, and by the end of the summer, Mom and dad got over their disappointment over my failure. It took a little while, but dad stopped blaming mom for what happened. Mom took advantage of the visa during the summer and traveled to the United States. She found a job there and decided to remain. Meanwhile, my siblings and I continued going to school while dad continued his normal routine.

One Sunday evening, Sophia and I went to the river, where we went to get water for the family. We did that when we ran out of water in our drums. Because we had to carry water to fill the drums, we did not like to do it; but it was the only way to have water for washing clothes, drinking, cooking, and bathing.

We had two or three drums filled with water at any given time, and each drum held 50-60 gallons of water. When the drums ran dry, we carried water on our heads uphill, usually in the morning, to fill the drum. Water came from the reservoir or any spring where water flowed.

While we were there, it dawned on me that feeling sorry for myself was not getting me anywhere. I knew I had to accept reality; my parents were not the first to separate, and they would not be the last. So, I adopted a new mantra, “I will not fail twice at the same thing,” and I pledged to live by it. I felt a lot of pressure because of the expectations of my parents, my sister, and my brothers. They thought highly of me and expected me to set the standard; I let them down when I failed. That would not happen again. I must admit that my family never made me feel like I failed them. Instead, they were comforting and encouraging. I was the one who felt that way. For three years, I did not do my best. I failed to put in the same effort I did while studying to pass the CEE exam.

I decided then and there that I would find my focus again. I would not settle for being less than my best. I would not repeat 11rh grade for the second time. I refused to allow failure to become a permanent fixture in my life. I decided that failure was an option I would refuse to recognize.

Evening practices and mock exams consumed my new life. I stayed up late to study at night and woke early to study in the morning. While my classmates played and relaxed during the weekend, I studied. Then, finally, I took the exam; and when I completed the exams, I went home without a care. I knew I did well. And the proof was in the pudding. When I received my final exam scores, I was successful in five subjects. I was so delighted that I did not even wait for the prom. Instead, I immediately enrolled in West Indies College and began taking classes in the summer session.

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