Edward Unspooled by Craig Lancaster

Author:Craig Lancaster [Lancaster, Craig]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Fiction
Publisher: Missouri Breaks Press
Published: 2016-07-23T06:00:00+00:00

My child ...

You’ll pardon me if I fudged the truth with your father. I’m feeling more and more weary as this goes on, and here, maybe not even at the midpoint, I catch myself looking ahead to what might be in store.

In the 19th week, your sensory systems will be developing—which means you may be able to hear my voice. I’ve been talking to you straight along, but now I’ll be doing it even more. This will also mark the acceleration of my getting bigger as I carry you. Not looking forward to that, I have to say.

In the 20th week, you’ll be the length of a banana, and you’ll be accumulating stuff in your bowels that could be your first poop. I find myself strangely fascinated by this.

In the 21st week, if you’re a girl, your vagina will be forming. (If you’re a boy and you’re reading this, please disregard this information.) Oh, how we’ll have talks about that. Count on it. My mom didn’t talk to me nearly enough about this, and I had to learn some things in a very difficult way. I won’t let that happen to you. I also understand that I may be getting some acne around this time, due to increased oil production. Can’t say I’m thrilled about that, either.

I love you,

Your mother

Here are a few of the names we’ve considered for you, but I think we’re just going set these aside and wait for your arrival. I think we’ll know the proper name when the time comes. Maybe when you read this someday you’ll be surprised:

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