Coffee, Tea or Me? by Donald Bain

Author:Donald Bain [Bain, Donald]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Publisher: Penguin USA, Inc.
Published: 2011-05-17T15:05:39+00:00

Rachel’s run-in with a lesbian was more bizarre than mine. Rachel always does things on a big scale. She infiltrated a whole den of them quite innocently.

She’d become friendly with a department store buyer on a flight from New York to Salt Lake City. The buyer, a stunning woman, invited Rachel to visit her in New York. A few weeks later Rachel received an invitation to a dinner party.

At the party were five others, including the hostess. There were two men, or, as Rachel put it, “sort of men.” The other two guests were both women, “sort of women,” in Rachel’s words.

After dinner, during which all of New York’s artists, writers, and politicians were analyzed in terms of their phallic symbolism—a train of conversation Rachel simply accepted as sophisticated—everyone retired to the living room.

An hour later, the hostess asked for silence, opened a desk drawer, and brought out a large, gray envelope. She took from it what appeared to be photographs, and without a word handed the pictures to Rachel.

There were seven, eight-by-ten pictures, each showing the hostess and the other girls in the dinner party in various poses of lovemaking. Everyone giggled as Rachel perused the file. Anyone else, as shocked as Rachel was, would have quit with the first one. But that’s Rachel. Her philosophy dictates that once something bad has begun, you might as well take it all in before you react. She studied each picture, aware of the eyes intently studying her face for signs of a favorable reaction. After looking at all seven she put the photographs down and turned to the hostess.

“I have to leave, now,” she announced flatly, “I have a lover who gets very mad when I’m late. She really gets violent.”

Rachel took her coat from the closet and walked out of the apartment. Once outside she pressed her ear to the door. Inside, someone was saying, “She is one of us. Let’s invite her again.”

The hostess could be heard replying, “Don’t be an ass. She made fun of us. I hate her.”

“I hope she gets pregnant,” one of the gay fellows threw in. They all giggled and Rachel walked away.

Passengers come in all styles and types. But as long as they buckle their seat belts, observe the No Smoking sign, and don’t pinch us as we pass, we couldn’t care less.

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