A Fashionable Indulgence by K. J. Charles

Author:K. J. Charles [Charles, K. J.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Romance, Fiction & Literature, Lgbt
ISBN: 9781101886021
Barnesnoble:
Goodreads: 23834716
Publisher: Loveswept
Published: 2015-07-31T14:00:00+00:00

Chapter 10

Harry looked absolutely wretched in the candlelight of Julius’s rooms. He’d had too many late nights, too much to drink, and it seemed as though it was catching up with him. His face was drawn and tired, stark white against the revolting puce of that bloody, bloody coat.

“Take that thing off,” Julius snapped, thrusting a silk banyan at him. “Sit down.”

Harry stripped off the offensive item without argument and pulled on the quilted silk gown, then sat on the nearest piece of furniture, which was the settle. Of course it was the settle. They’d sprawled all over it together several times now, making a mess of seed and sweat. Damn his eyes.

“Well?”

Harry looked up, face twisted with misery. “I need to apologize. I’ve done everything badly. I don’t think I learned anything important from you at all.”

“I’m sorry to have wasted your time,” Julius said furiously.

“I didn’t mean that!” Harry’s voice was urgent with the need for understanding. “I mean…I learned all the little things and all the time you were standing by me and I was…Oh God, Julius.” He put his face in his hands. “Gideon waved his gold at me and I went running off without a thought for Silas, or my mother, or all the people who brought me up. I agreed to marry for money, I never cared what Verona thought, and I didn’t care what you said. All I did was think about myself.”

“Quite,” Julius said. “And now you are inflicting this rather tedious self-abasement on me because…?”

“I need to tell you this. I know damned well you won’t want me again, but I need you to understand. I have to marry Verona if I want the money, but when I imagine it, all I can think of is you. I didn’t tell you about the engagement because…because I wanted to have you and my grandfather’s money.” His mouth, made for smiling, twisted unhappily. “And I don’t have you, and I don’t have your friendship, and I’m not going to have my grandfather’s money either, so—”

“What? Why not?”

“Because I’m not going to marry Verona. She despises me. She’s hateful to me whenever there’s nobody else to hear.”

Julius stared at him. “Richard said—”

“I think she probably told him so. I did quite a lot of thinking tonight. I think she’s trying to make me cry off. If I refuse to marry her, Gideon will be furious with me, and she’ll be his only heir.”

“That’s a damned serious accusation.”

“I’m not going to accuse her,” Harry said. “Maybe I’m wrong. But I am quite sure she doesn’t want to marry me, and I won’t marry her. I might see if Gideon will pay me to go away quietly. Learn a trade, perhaps. If I can’t do that I’ll go back to the bookshop.” He tucked his arms round his midriff. “God, listen to me, talking about myself. I just wanted to tell you that you should have been able to trust me. That you deserve someone loyal who makes you happy, and I wish I’d stood by you.

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