The Sweetness of Honey by Petronius Jablonski

Author:Petronius Jablonski
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: General Fiction
Published: 2018-05-16T16:00:00+00:00

THIRTEEN

Not So Good Vibrations

Is Satan deaf? When did he announce that he prefers the horrendous noise downstairs to jazz or bluegrass? Duncan rolls two foam plugs into thin stems and gently inserts them in his ears. The character portrayed by Goethe would have detested morons scraping three chords and growling, as would the sophisticate described in “Sympathy for the Devil.” The Lord of Darkness should be offended by the feebleminded art dedicated to him. If he’s hoping to win converts this will fail spectacularly. The adolescent white males who partake will abandon it as soon as their testosterone levels decrease.

Duncan adds a crumpled Old Style to the ones beside the couch and picks up a book. On the cover, four young women in varying states of undress surround a grizzled old man wearing a silk smoking jacket. In one hand he holds a tuning fork; the other gives a thumbs-up. His wink radiates depravity in a way few things do. Duncan rereads a portion that won’t sink in.

• • •

This is the important chapter, the one you’ve been waiting for. As soon as we extract this rotten misconception the rest is sweet, sweet gravy. What is a conscience and why can’t hypnosis override it? That’s what you’re asking. It’s the first article of faith everyone is taught. Hypnosis can’t make someone do what she wouldn’t do under normal circumstances.

That, my friends, is nonsense.

I encourage you to rip this page out and tape it dead center on your headboard. Peek at it from time to time in the following months. Try not to giggle. The guest underneath you will think you’re laughing at her.

Ask yourself something. Why do people flock to hypnotists to quit smoking or drop thirty pounds? Because they could never in a million years do these things under normal circumstances and are therefore trying extraordinary ones. They are looking for an injection of willpower. Likewise, how many people would normally dance around a stage clucking like a chicken?

Here’s an excellent definition of a hypnotist. A hypnotist is someone who puts you in an altered state of consciousness and tricks you into doing what you normally wouldn’t, like going without booze or cigarettes or ice cream. I wonder why this obvious definition isn’t more popular. (We’ll get to that if they let me live long enough to finish typing this book and send it to my publisher. In the unlikely event you are reading this, I suggest locking your doors before proceeding. The Powers That Be have a vested interest in keeping this information from you.)

The article of faith about the Invincible Conscience has gained currency for one reason. It discourages the common man from availing himself of the awesome power of Vibrato Hypnosis. Compared to the technique you’ve been reading about in this book, normal hypnosis is a pistol next to an atom bomb. “The potential for evil is too great with Vibrato Hypnosis,” they say. “Its use must be restricted.” Sure, restricted to them. I’m not one

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