Shakespeare's Henriad--Complete Tetralogy by William Shakespeare

Author:William Shakespeare [Shakespeare, William, Hazlitt, William]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 4057664557124
Publisher: e-artnow
Published: 2019-11-21T00:00:00+00:00

ACT II.

Table of Contents

SCENE I.

London. A street.

Table of Contents

[Enter Hostess, Fang and his Boy with her, and Snare following.]

HOSTESS.

Master Fang, have you entered the action?

FANG.

It is entered.

HOSTESS.

Where ‘s your yeoman? Is ‘t a lusty yeoman? will ‘a stand to ‘t?

FANG.

Sirrah, where ‘s Snare?

HOSTESS.

O Lord, ay! good Master Snare.

SNARE.

Here, here.

FANG.

Snare, we must arrest Sir John Falstaff.

HOSTESS.

Yea, good Master Snare; I have entered him and all.

SNARE.

It may chance cost some of our lives, for he will stab.

HOSTESS. Alas the day! take heed of him; he stabbed me in mine own house, and that most beastly: in good faith, he cares not what mischief he does, if his weapon be out: he will foin like any devil; he will spare neither man, woman, nor child.

FANG.

If I can close with him, I care not for his thrust.

HOSTESS.

No, nor I neither: I’ll be at your elbow.

FANG.

An I but fist him once; an ‘a come but within my vice,—

HOSTESS. I am undone by his going; I warrant you, he ‘s an infinitive thing upon my score. Good Master Fang, hold him sure: good Master Snare, let him not ‘scape. A’ comes continuantly to Pie-corner—saving your manhoods—to buy a saddle; and he is indited to dinner to the Lubber’s-head in Lumbert Street, to Master Smooth’s the silkman: I pray ye, since my exion is entered and my case so openly known to the world, let him be brought in to his answer. A hundred mark is a long one for a poor lone woman to bear: and I have borne, and borne, and borne; and have been fubbed off, and fubbed off, and fubbed off, from this day to that day, that it is a shame to be thought on. There is no honesty in such dealing; unless a woman should be made an ass and a beast, to bear every knave’s wrong. Yonder he comes; and that arrant malmsey-nose knave, Bardolph, with him. Do your offices, do your offices, Master Fang and Master Snare, do me, do me, do me your offices.

[Enter Falstaff, Page, and Bardolph.]

FALSTAFF.

How now! whose mare’s dead? what’s the matter?

FANG.

Sir John, I arrest you at the suit of Mistress Quickly.

FALSTAFF. Away, varlets! Draw, Bardolph: cut me off the villain’s head: throw the quean in the channel.

HOSTESS. Throw me in the channel! I’ll throw thee in the channel. Wilt thou? wilt thou? thou bastardly rogue! Murder, murder! Ah, thou honeysuckle villain! wilt thou kill God’s officers and the king’s? Ah, thou honey-seed rogue! thou art a honey-seed, a manqueller, and a woman-queller.

FALSTAFF.

Keep them off, Bardolph.

FANG.

A rescue! a rescue!

HOSTESS. Good people, bring a rescue or two. Thou wo’t, wo’t thou? thou wo’t, wo’t ta? do, do, thou rogue! do, thou hemp-seed!

PAGE. Away, you scullion! you rampallian! you fustilarian! I’ll tickle your catastrophe.

[Enter the Lord Chief-Justice, and his men.]

CHIEF JUSTICE.

What is the matter? keep the peace here, ho!

HOSTESS.

Good my lord, be good to me. I beseech you, stand to me.

CHIEF JUSTICE.

How now, Sir John! what are you brawling here?

Doth this become your place, your time and business?

You should have been well on your way to York.

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