Parenting the Wholehearted Child by Jeannie Cunnion

Author:Jeannie Cunnion
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: ebook
Publisher: Zondervan
Published: 2014-03-01T00:00:00+00:00

chapter 13

kindness

Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

— Ephesians 4:32

When I picked Cal up from his play date at the park, I asked, as usual, “How was your day, sweet face?”

Cal burst into tears. “Mom, someone called me weird on the playground, and he wouldn’t let me play basketball with the group.”

Seeing my sweet boy this upset made my mama bear instinct go into overdrive. I somehow mustered up the strength not to say what I wanted to say, which was along the lines of, “Baby, you can tell that kid that if he ever treats you that way again you will kick . . .” Well, never mind what I wanted to say. It completely lacked the compassion and kindness I long to model for the kids.

The world can be difficult and mean, but research reveals that children make seven times as many negative and controlling comments to their siblings as they do to their friends.16 This research is just another reminder of how important it is to create a home where we are kind and compassionate toward one another so our home can be our haven. Our children know that we refuse to have a home where they tear each other down. Rather, our home is where we speak the truth in love. Paul said it so well in Ephesians: “Speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head — that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work” (Eph. 4:15 – 16).

We teach our children that God created us as a family for a purpose. He is not a God of “let’s just let the pieces fall where they may.” No, it was not by accident that God placed Cal, Brennan, and Owen in our care, and I want them to recognize how we are each an essential part of this family or “body.” We teach our children that we are each growing into the person God created us to be, and each one of us has our own purpose to fulfill and work to do. If the children can grasp how they are each created with unique gifts and talents, they are more likely to celebrate one another’s success. This is one of the ways we inspire kindness in, and among, the children.

Kindness Begins with Us

One wonderful way we can inspire kindness between our children is by modeling to them how to “encourage one another and build each other up” (1 Thess. 5:11). Each day, we can look for ways to build our children up with sincere words of love, affirmation, and affection. Ask yourself, “When I see my children after their long day at school, does my face light up and do my arms fly open?” Ask your children questions like, “Do

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