Ingram by Louis C.K

Author:Louis C.K.
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781637747919
Publisher: BenBella Books
Published: 2025-08-06T00:00:00+00:00

“WELL, GOOD MORNING,” SAID A voice that scared me harder than anything in my life. I sprung up on my feet, whipped around, looking for who said it. But there was no one in sight. “Up here, kid,” said the voice again. I looked up and saw a man sitting up in a tree. He was a white man. I had started to notice if a man was white, black, or a Mexican. His hair was white too, though he didn’t look old. He wore a thick jacket of leather like an old saddle taken apart and sewn together, with no shirt under it. His pants were dark blue with thin white stripes down the sides. He wore a black hat that was round over the top of his head. He had something about his face that made me like to look at it. Even though he was way up in the tree, sitting in the crook of a bough against the trunk, I could see his face from far below him. His shoes were brown and white with black bottoms.

“When did you get up there?” I asked him.

“Up where?” he said, looking confused.

“Up in that tree.”

“I always been up here,” he said. “How’d you get down there?” I started walking along the pond’s edge again.

“You hunting for bullfrogs?” he asked me, as I heard the sound of him scrambling down from the tree and following me.

“Yeah,” I said. “Hungry.”

Now the man was walking beside me. He was not much tall for a man. In fact he was just my size. But his face showed him to be a man for sure. He walked with his hands in his pockets and watched me have no luck finding a bullfrog.

“Best to scare them outta the grass and into the water,” he said. “I’ll stomp around and you catch what comes.”

I said, “Alright.”

And the man started stomping and shuffling around in the grass and saying, “Ha bullfrog! Ha now! Come on now, bullfrog! Ha now!” And out of grass came hopping, almost flying, a big fat bullfrog, which I caught right outta the air, my hands coming together around it so fast that my hurting arm hit me with a pain like a hammer to the center of my mind. I screamed and fell to the ground on my bottom, my elbow feeling hot like a fire.

“Holy hell, buddy,” said the man. “Looks like your arm’s broke.”

“Feels like it’s full of knives,” I said.

“You managed to hang onto that bullfrog, though.” He pointed at how I had caught hold and kept that frog’s foot between my fingers. The man took it from me and he swung that frog in the air by its legs and brought it down on a rock by the pond’s edge and a little blood spurted out, showing it was dead. “Tell you what,” he said. “You do the flushing, and I’ll do the catching.”

We commenced to catching bullfrogs together. I stomped around in the grass and I made noises just like he had.

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