Grace, Not Perfection (with Bonus Content) by Emily Ley

Author:Emily Ley
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Thomas Nelson
Published: 2016-08-31T16:00:00+00:00

CREATING COMMUNITY

I realized through that experience that God wanted me to learn how to make genuine friends—second-grade style. That involved me saying hi to complete strangers and thinking up reasons for us to get together (and get to know each other). I couldn’t just sit around and wait for a new friend to find me; I had to put myself out there and seek community. I needed to invite them to the table! I had to show up for people unexpectedly. I looked for any way to be a friend and love on people: sending cards to a friend battling Lyme disease, taking dinner to a new mama, having dinner with a recently divorced friend even though I knew I didn’t have the time. I carved out space in my life for friendship because it truly is important, and my life has been forever blessed because of the women I’ve connected with.

And little by little, my village began to form. Yes, it takes a village to raise a child, but it also takes a village to do life well. This little village of mine encourages me, challenges me, tells me to pick myself up when I need to, and shows up when I need them. We do that for each other. That’s what villages do. They care deeply for one another.

Earlier this year, we moved into a new house. Our new neighbors kindly invited us over for dinner just a few short days after we got settled. Bryan and I were really looking forward to making new friends. We got all the kids dressed in their cutest outfits, picked up a veggie tray from the grocery store, and walked over. I was a little embarrassed by my pre-packaged veggie tray (not my usual “let-me-bring-something” appetizer) and nervous about taking three kids under five to someone’s home, because that’s just plain scary and unpredictable. So I packed the best diaper bag ever: four bottles, their favorite toys, blankets, and at least sixteen pacifiers. Everything we’d need to avert disaster.

As it turned out, Brady made friends with their children really quickly and ran off to play. Bryan held Caroline, and I held Tyler. We chatted and laughed and talked about the home-building process. I thought to myself, I’ve got this! This mother-of-three thing is mine. Take that!

And then it happened.

Tyler started to scream. It didn’t even begin as a little cry. No way, sister. It was a downright get-me-out-of-here, how-dare-you-take-me-out-in-public siren of a cry. I batted my eyelashes a few times, bounced him on my hip, and laughed nervously (because surely he was going to calm down and prove to everyone my awesome mothering skills).

He didn’t stop. My sweet middle child, three minutes older than his sister, never cries. Never ever. He is the easiest baby this side of the Mississippi. But that night he had other plans.

I started sweating and exchanging panicked looks with Bryan. Bryan nonchalantly buckled Caroline into the stroller while I used my super-calm-under-pressure voice to call Brady downstairs.

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