Forgotten Shadow: Chronicles of the Umbra: Book 1 (Chronicles of Umbra) by Taylor Patterson

Author:Taylor Patterson [Patterson, Taylor]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2023-08-11T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter 24:

“You’re not breathing,” Phedra snapped from across the training arena. “If you keep pulling with your focus like that, you’ll burn yourself out. You won’t build strength, you’ll cripple yourself. Our abilities are a part of us. Sit.”

I groaned but complied. I hated meditation. All that happened was I was forced to endure thoughts and memories that I’d rather leave unacknowledged. And that was probably a coward’s reasoning, but I just wasn’t ready to face what I’d done at Jaleesa’s hand. The blood that I had spilt. The things done to me by her soldiers.

“Deep breath in through your nose, slow exhale through your mouth. You know the drill.” My aunt sat next to me in the lotus position, hands braced on her knees with her eyes closed.

I counted to five on each inhale and exhale. The more I breathed, the less aware I was of the world around me. I became attuned to a slight hum of power that held the fabric of our world together. The power of the gods.

Phedra said I could feel it because of the star that marked me as special. Damaris’ star blazed on my temple each time I set foot in her sanctuary. As honored as I was, I also resented it a little. My life would be nothing but chaos because of that blessing. My loving husband had taken to calling me his personal chaos monster. I knew he meant it in jest, but a small part of me feared that he would grow to regret being bound to me because of the chaos I would bring him.

“You’re frowning…meditation is to clear your mind, not to fixate on negative thoughts.”

“If you know a way to shut my brain up, I am all ears.” I kept my eyes closed as I spoke, wading through the dark thoughts and attempting to build a wall around my inner thoughts to keep them from distracting me.

“Open your eyes.” My aunt had moved to sit directly in front of me. Her golden eyes, now inches from my own, were threaded with shadows. They swirled in their depths, enchanting me. Did my eyes do that when I worked with the shadows? “Your fears are always going to be with you. Some can be conquered; others cannot and those become a part of you. But only you can decide which fears can harm you, which can be allowed to fester and pollute the rest of your being. You decide, Fallon. You are in complete control of yourself. No one

can control you.”

Tears welled up in my eyes immediately. But I was not sad. I was grateful…my aunt had effectively shattered through the last lingering wall that I hid myself behind. The wall I’d formed to hide behind when I grew old enough to understand how the village worked…to understand that I had no choices. I lived and breathed in someone else’s world where I had to voice. No autonomy.

I flung my arms around my aunt’s neck, allowing the tears to fall as the wall within me shattered.

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