Engaged (The ABCs of Erotica) by Maxxwell Lexi

Author:Maxxwell, Lexi [Maxxwell, Lexi]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: erotica
Publisher: Lexi Maxxwell
Published: 2014-01-20T08:00:00+00:00

My Zoe

I’m driving to Zoe’s.

This was the part of my past I most need to look in the eye.

If I don’t do this, Richard will ask me why I bothered at all.

I love Zoe. Unlike Leigh or Cooper, I didn’t have to look her up to see where she was, or hope she was still in the same place.

I look all the time. Less since Richard, but plenty.

No one in the world understands me more than Zoe. My parents, Mark and Samantha, know me well, but only in the way family can. Richard gets me more than any man ever has, and probably ever could, but he isn’t Zoe.

She is a woman, like me.

Zoe was born wealthy, and like me, was poisoned with an early lust for life and an appetite for the best that money can buy. And like me, she was a quiet troublemaker in school, the type who managed to stay out of trouble most of the time. We met in art school, and left together our sophomore year.

We never fought, until we realized we were a couple. Arguments every now and then seemed more natural after that. We had both fooled around with girls in the past, but neither of us considered ourselves lesbians. After nearly two years, completely exclusive with Zoe, I started to wonder if that’s what I was.

We listened to the same music, read the same books, and watched the same movies and TV. We liked eating the same things and having sex in mostly the same ways — I wanted it more often, but not by much. She was softer than I would have sometimes preferred, but she soothed me in a way no one or nothing else ever has, including Richard. It was wonderful, until we realized we couldn’t be together.

Zoe was going to be an actress. There was nothing I — or anyone else — could do to stop her. She’s certainly pretty enough to be famous, but I thought that struggling for stardom as an actress was the wrong choice for Zoe. And I didn’t want to move to New York.

Our goodbye was awful. Not too long, or too short. Just one long and horrible night. A couple, then nothing.

We stayed friends on Facebook.

I devastated myself after that. I steered clear of drugs, but just barely, and steered clear of little else. I even did some porn. High-class stuff, and I kept my face out of it. It was for one of my friends, Liam McAllister. He didn’t drop out as a sophomore, and did gorgeous stuff. I wore a mask for the project. His film was called, The Girl Next Door (You’ll Never Know it’s Her).

I’m still proud of this, though I’ll never show it to anyone other than Richard. Sometimes we watch it together.

My parents could smell something was up after Zoe. They knew I was hurting, just not why. I never introduced them to my girlfriend, because I was a coward, and never wanted to have that conversation.

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