Between Heaven and Hell by Erin Trejo

Author:Erin Trejo [Trejo, Erin]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2020-06-25T23:00:00+00:00

Chapter 26

I never knew pushing Ava away would hurt as badly as it does. My chest seems to be permanently clenched. It aches like nothing I’ve ever felt. I walk into the church with Ava next to me on one side and Jordy and Nikolai on the other. It seems so surreal to be coming to my sister’s funeral. A funeral that should have been mine.

We take our seats at the front as people filter in. I knew this would be a big turn out because of who I am and who she was. The pastor begins to speak as my mind wanders. Funerals were never my thing. Talking about the life of the dead never made sense to me. They’re gone, there is nothing we can gain from that. There are no words that can comfort the grieving. He speaks but I hear nothing. There’s a buzz all around me, inside me. Nothing in this world made any sense to me until Ava and Amelia showed up. Now that’s all being ripped away from me in the blink of an eye. Her tiny body lies in that coffin, a victim of this cruel and senseless world.

It isn’t fair to Ava for me to keep her in the depths of hell along with me. Until I can figure out the best moves for me and what to do about Gambino, she can’t be near me. I look over to find her eyes on me, picking up every little piece of ash from my crumbled soul, holding them in her battered hands. I reach for her hand, but she knows what’s happening. I can see it in those eyes. I turn back and listen to the pastor speak about Amelia’s life as if he’d known her. I fight the tears that threaten to eat away at me if I let them.

“Amelia was an angel. She was forced into a world of sin much like we all are. She skated on that thin line between heaven and hell. We all find ourselves there at some point in time. Amelia found her way into heaven. She now soars high above us all, taking pieces of us with her.” I can’t handle this. I want to crack. I want to run from the church. Too much hurt radiates through my body. It eats away at my insides. The air in the room is stifling. I can’t breathe. Taking a few deep breathes, I steady myself as the pastor finishes up.

When it’s time, I release Ava’s hand and get the hell out of there. Rounding the corner, I lean against the wall of the church sticking a cigarette between my lips. I’m not even a smoker, not since I was younger.

“We will make them suffer, Cord.” Nikolai comes to stand next to me as I nod.

“That, I have no doubt. They will all pay in due time.” He nods before looking over at Ava. She talks with Jordy, but her eyes are so sad. I hate that for her.

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