Your Brain Is Playing Tricks On You by Albert Moukheiber

Author:Albert Moukheiber [Moukheiber, Albert]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781915054715
Publisher: Legend Press
Published: 2022-03-24T09:57:18+00:00

The illusion of control

If we trust examples of cases where an external locus of control inhibits our action and hinders our willpower and our free will, it seems that, in comparison, an internal locus of control is a good thing. Nonetheless, leaning towards a locus of control that is too internal leads to an illusion of control and self-control which can have harmful consequences on our mental health and that of those around us.

Someone who thinks they can control everything will tend to blame themselves for a mistake they haven’t directly made, and will be exactly as intransigent towards others, considering them as capable of the same absolute control. It’s not for nothing that we often use the expression ‘control freak’ to talk about it.

People with a very internal locus of control are very often perfectionists in the negative sense of the term, which makes them fall more easily into the binary thinking trap mentioned in Chapter 3. A control freak will think that everything that is not absolutely48 perfect is completely rubbish and only worth throwing away. They lose their ability to perceive nuance, which is necessary to the elaboration of critical reasoning, and they reach a form of mental rigidity. This is often (mis)taken for arrogance, which makes people with an excessive ILC struggle to have healthy and fulfilling social relationships.

Another pitfall: someone with an excessively internal locus of control can develop a “saviour syndrome”. They will want to solve other people’s problems to the point of being intrusive, refusing to let them make mistakes, learn and find their own path: we can’t “save” someone against their will!

An excessively internal locus of control can be a real hindrance to being a part of society: when you think you can control everything by yourself and you are faced with an emergency, you will hesitate to ask for help since, for you, everything is under your control. Similarly, if during your studies or at work you are led to work in a team, you won’t manage to delegate, not even to let your teammates do their part of the job.49

Believing we don’t have a grip on our environment and sinking into inaction or even apathy is a trap. Believing we’re omnipotent and that everything depends on our willpower is also a trap. Therefore, there isn’t an inherently good or bad locus of control. The importance is to not lean too much towards one or the other. The only way to find this balance is to analyse situations as best we can in order to determine how much or how little things depend on us. But this knowledge of the world and of situations is far from easy, especially because we are often the victims of an illusion of knowledge.

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