Wild Mind: A Field Guide to the Human Psyche by Bill Plotkin

Author:Bill Plotkin [Plotkin, Bill]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Body; Mind & Spirit, Inspiration & Personal Growth, Mental Health, Non-Fiction, Personality, Psychology, Self-Help, Spiritual
ISBN: 9781608681792
Google: OczmHOQi5zsC
Amazon: B00C335IEK
Publisher: New World Library
Published: 2013-04-07T23:00:00+00:00

ORPHANS:

CONFORMISTS, VICTIMS, REBELS, AND PRINCES AND PRINCESSES

Most of us were not literally orphaned, but all of us experienced, early in life, psychological abandonments — cataclysmic moments of realizing we must fend for ourselves emotionally, socially, or physically. Even if we were adored and well sheltered within a loving family, we experienced ourselves, at times, as alone in the world. What five-year-old hasn’t realized there isn’t anyone who can perfectly protect him from pain, embarrassment, loss, illness, accidents, or the occasional cruelty of other children?

The Orphan archetype begins to take hold the first time we feel let down by caregivers who have been less than perfect in their caregiving. In that moment, we feel forsaken. This is one of our first conscious experiences in life: being split off, tossed out of paradise, suddenly separated and needing to make independent decisions for our own welfare. Aghast, we realize we understand our needs better than our caregivers do, that on some level we’re fundamentally on our own. Orphaned.

The archetype of the Orphan is a living presence within each of us, taking the form of our South subpersonalities using their immature strategies to create the kinds of relationships that might meet our basic human needs.

The four main forms of the Orphan archetype — Conformists, Victims, Rebels, and Princes/Princesses — correspond to four interpersonal styles. The difference between them concerns their primary emotional reaction (fear or anger) to having been wounded in childhood and their status (insider or outsider) relative to mainstream society or a desired community. Conformists are fearful insiders. Victims are fearful outsiders. Rebels are angry outsiders. Princes and Princesses are angry insiders.

Conformists

The Conformist’s biggest fear is that he’ll be abandoned again. He does whatever is necessary — submission and subservience — to meet the membership requirements of whichever group grants him the most desirable social status. Most Conformists adopt the values and roles of mainstream society, like Conrad the insurance executive. But others conform to the behavioral code of a gang, an ashram, or a personal-growth program. The more pleasing and impressive the Conformist’s self-presentation, the better the place and rewards he’ll be granted.

The Conformist is the most popular Orphan option in egocentric middle-class society, because, if the Self-animated path to authenticity and wholeness is unavailable, the most attractive alternative way of life is one with egocentric rewards — security, comfort, money, consumer products, professional prestige, and power over others.

Everywhere we turn in mainstream Western society, we run into the same materialistic message: Life is about maximizing monetary wealth, possessions, physical attractiveness, and dominator power. A person’s goodness or popularity is a matter of how much he owns, how good he looks, and how much he controls. This is the most common message in contemporary politics, business, education, and much of egocentric religion, as well as in Hollywood movies, mainstream books and magazines, TV programming, and other forms of culture-degrading advertisement. And this is the subtext in a large percentage of conversations people have every day in egocentric society.

Victims

Like the Conformist, the

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