Wardens of Wisteria by Angela Pepper

Author:Angela Pepper
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Angela Pepper
Published: 2018-11-04T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter 19

I’d been to the underground headquarters of the Department of Water and Magic a few times. Each time, I’d gone in through a different secret entrance. It was only logical that the place had a few access points—all the better to hide a stream of people and creatures coming in and out—but it was nevertheless dizzying.

For this visit, we entered the Wisteria Police Department, then ducked through a service door, which brought us to an elevator with the expected high-tech security panel. There was a palm and eye scan for Bentley, and then, weirdly enough, a brief interrogation by a disembodied female voice.

“Welcome back, Zara Riddle,” the voice said, managing to sound both robotic and breathily sexy at the same time. “We hope you enjoy your visit to our headquarters.”

“Thank you, disembodied voice,” I said.

“You may call me Codex,” she said, sounding husky along with breathy.

Bentley muttered under his breath, “That’s new.”

“I am new,” she replied. “Thank you for noticing, Detective. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Codex. I am the voice of this building’s automated systems.”

I peered up at the glowing red dot on the video screen. “Are you a robot?”

“Thank you for asking, Ms. Riddle. I am not a robot. I am the voice of this building’s automated systems.”

“You’re software?”

“Thank you for asking, Ms. Riddle. I am not software. Software is a program used by a computer. Let me see if I can explain by using an example. You and Detective Bentley use the language English, yet you are not English.”

Bentley frowned. “My ancestors are English.”

“A wonderful observation,” cooed the voice. “My ancestors are software.”

Bentley muttered something unintelligible.

The light on the display screen turned amber. The voice—Codex—continued, “We have now exceeded our allotted time allowance for pleasantries. Please proceed to your destination at once.”

The doors slid open faster than I’d ever seen elevator doors open. Bentley and I hopped in immediately. We exchanged a look but didn’t dare speak until we we’d ridden down multiple stories, then exited the elevator.

“That was new,” Bentley said again, once the doors had closed between us.

I gave him a bemused look. “We are currently ten or twenty stories beneath street level, inside a labyrinth of secret tunnels, filled with monsters. Does the fact that the exits are guarded by a flirty artificial intelligence make you feel more safe or less safe?”

He squeezed his chin thoughtfully. “With some things, it’s best not to ask questions or examine too closely.”

“I hear you. It’s like when you’re getting on an airplane, and you recognize the pilot from the fast food pit at the airport, where you noticed he had trouble getting his straw into his drink container.” I mimed clumsy repeated stabbing. “And he kept going like this, over and over, poke, poke, poke, not hitting the little patch of foil over the hole, until finally the straw gave up and crumpled in on itself.”

“That’s a rather specific example.”

I squeezed my own chin thoughtfully. “It wasn’t a perfect simile. How about this? It’s like when you’re donating blood, and you—”

“Blood?” His eyes widened.

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