Three Months in Florence by Mary Carter

Author:Mary Carter [Carter, Mary]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Kensington Books
Published: 2015-12-15T00:00:00+00:00

I leave the hotel room feeling like a puppet whose strings have been severed. As if I don’t know how to even move on my own. Without my family! Who do I think I am? Why didn’t they put up more of a fight? They don’t seem traumatized at all. They are going to have a fabulous time; it’s going to be all ordering pizzas and playing video games, and Alex is going to fly Alexandria home, and I am going to come back to obese children who have forgotten how to talk in complete sentences. Is Alex going to laugh every time Rachel demeans her brother? I should turn around right now and call this whole thing off.

I stop in front of a squat stone building. It looks medieval. It is sandwiched in between larger sandstone buildings, tucked slightly back. A cross hangs above arched wooden doors that are propped wide open. People file inside. I follow them and stand in the entryway. A series of tiny candles flicker behind the last row of pews. Organ music plays long and low. The floor is simple, faded wood planks, and there is one stained-glass window, and a single statue of Mary, as well as one painting of Jesus. I love it. The simplicity makes me believe. I’ve never really gone to church. Ornate, large rooms overloaded with statues and glass overwhelm me. To my surprise, I find myself heading for a pew and taking a seat toward the back.

I lean my head back and look at the low, domed ceiling where wood planks criss-cross like an art sculpture. I’m sure there’s an architectural reason, but to me it looks like they’re banning heaven. Maybe only sinners look up and see this; maybe others look up and see the sky. If that’s the case, I should be grateful I’m not looking into a ball of fire. I didn’t realize how much anger I’ve been holding in my body, until I start to feel some of it slide off. I live here, I think. I am free.

A hiccup escapes me. I throw my hand over my mouth and look around. No one is paying any attention. I hope I can stop them. I close my eyes and hold my breath. And I troll through my memories of Alex and me, dusting them off, shining them up. Because he has forgotten, and I must make him remember.

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