The Year's Best Science Fiction & Fantasy Novellas 2015 by Paula Guran

Author:Paula Guran [Paula Guran]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
ISBN: 9781607014645
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

CLAUDIUS REX

John P. Murphy

«Turn left here,» said my new Jeeves 5 artificial intelligence. I’d have happily done it, too—with a spring in my step, even—except there was a manhole open with a robot working in it, and I didn’t care to dirty my interview clothes.

I crossed the street instead.

«Confound you, turn left!»

Now, if I’d been creamed by that car while standing slack-jaw surprised in the street, this would be a very different story. As it was, it was a near thing. I now cherish the memory as only the first time Claudius Rex nearly got me killed.

«Or keep going and then turn left, I don’t care. Just move.» I hied to the curb and set myself to figuring out what the heck was going on. One expects a certain standard of behavior from a program called Jeeves: more “Very good, sir” than “Confound you,” if you take my meaning. On the other hand, I’d been out of things for a year. I thought maybe this was the new fashion in artificial intelligence. A few years before, it’d been Australian accents. Maybe now it was rudeness.

“Jeeves,” I subvocalized, “Confirm that you are operating within normal parameters.”

«Of course I am. Your destination is north and west of here, approximately six hundred meters. Go there.»

Like I said, I’d been out of it for a while, so that was good enough for me. Let nobody say Andy Baldwin is unsophisticated. But I’d like some credit for having been suspicious.

I was in among MIT’s constellation of children along the Red Line, hoofing it toward Fujiwara and Klein Associates, the kind souls who’d offered me a job two days out of the clink despite my revoked PI license. I’d decided to catch some fresh air instead of taking the subway that morning. I knew Boston just well enough to keep track of where I was relative to the transit stops and I’d passed a virtual sign for Central Square a few blocks back, which meant I was in the right general place already. So I wasn’t too worried. But I did not intend to mess this up, screwy AI or no.

Said screwy AI delivered me to a big glass door marked TuriTech.

“Confirm destination,” I subbed.

«We’re here. Go inside.»

“I beg to differ,” I said, the very model of suspicious patience. “We are not at Fujiwara and Klein. Please recalibrate and direct me there.”

I smiled politely at all the fine people giving me funny looks as I waited like a chump blocking the sidewalk while the faithful Jeeves recalibrated. I realized as I stood there that I hadn’t seen any virtual ads in a while: usually they’re overlaid on storefronts or cars or any flat clear surface. Instead, the buildings across the street from TuriTech just showed blank masonry, weirdly still without any animated pigs selling me junk. Of course, without any virtual signs, I was completely dependent on Jeeves.

«Just go inside, this will only take ten minutes.»

As you might imagine, that was not the response I had been hoping for.

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