The Queen and the Tower by Shannon Page

Author:Shannon Page
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Outland Entertainment
Published: 2019-03-15T00:00:00+00:00

Sadly, even the most delightful distractions only distract for so long.

“Mmm,” I murmured, nestled in Raymond’s arms. “Thank you.”

“It was my pleasure.” He nibbled my ear.

I sighed and sat up, extracting myself from his warm embrace. It felt almost physically painful to pull away from him. “So.”

“So.” He gazed at me from his end of the couch. No, he did not look like a scared puppy; that was just me projecting.

I took a deep breath. “So.”

“You said that.” He gave me a tentative grin.

“Yeah.” I smiled back. “You’re right: there are a lot of things in my life I haven’t shared with you. And for very good reasons—which I also can’t share.” He started to answer; I held up a hand. “No, please, I’m going to tell you as much as I can, so let me just say it all out. Then you can ask questions if you want.”

He nodded. “Okay.”

“I told you when we met that I lived in an intentional community. And that’s true, but it’s not what you think. I let you believe it was some sort of free-love commune, because I knew that would make more sense to you. And it would stop you asking too many questions.” I gave him a sheepish smile. “But…it’s a religious community, actually. One with a very, very long history of deep privacy. Which looks like secrecy from the outside, I know.”

I don’t read minds either, but I could almost see the words going through his brain: She’s in some sort of cult?

“I’m still a full-fledged member of that community, even though I moved out of the…main house,” I went on. “I still participate in the practices and rituals and important communal meals. I still teach younger members of the order. But they agreed to my moving out for a little while; perhaps a few years. We all agreed I needed a little more space of my own.

“My birth family also belongs to this community, though by joining this other household when I came of age, that sort of…reconfigured the significance of the people in my life. This is how it’s done with us. I’m still very fond of my birth parents, but my house members are my true family.” I smiled again. “Complete with sibling rivalry. Which is part of the reason I’m trying to develop more of an outside social life. I really like your friends, and I love you. But, well, there’s a limit on how much I’m going to be able to share—with you or anyone on the outside. There are always going to be secrets. I don’t really have any say in the matter.”

Raymond just kept watching me. He looked very unhappy, and rather confused.

“You can ask questions now,” I said.

“You can’t even tell me the name of the…religion?”

“It’s, ah, a form of paganism. You won’t have heard of it.”

“Oh.” He thought a moment. “And you’re not…I mean, you could leave it if you wanted to? You don’t need…help?”

A surprised chuckle escaped me. “Oh, um, it’s not like that.

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