The Mother You Knew by Leila Hilkmann

Author:Leila Hilkmann [Hilkmann, Leila]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2023-06-10T23:00:00+00:00

LONELINESS

At the end of May Darien surprises me.

“I’d like to take the kids to visit my parents. They’re planning on coming to Belgium and renting an apartment in Knokke for two weeks … they suggested that the three of us spend time together. So why don’t you enjoy some free time over here by yourself and join us in two weeks for the weekend …then you and the kids can continue from there to Israel…”

I’m stupefied by his suggestion. In the past, Darien has always found excuses to avoid spending time with the children. I was hoping that perhaps his near death experience had triggered a change in him or awakened a sincere wish to work on our relationship.

I land in Belgium on a gray rainy morning.

“What d’you think?” Darien smiles hesitantly, pecks my forehead and moves a finger over his newly sprouted mustache.

The drive to Knokke is slow. The silence in the car is louder than the thundering rain. We sit inside the muted space and listen to the noisy beatings on the car and watch the constant no-no’s of the windshield wipers. An hour and a half later we reach Knokke. When the door opens I meet a gray-faced Stella and Helmut. Oz and Sevan remain standing to the side.

“I missed you,” I bend down and hug Sevan’s smallness.

She’s frozen in place.

“What’s wrong, Sevannie?”

Her small arms tighten around my neck but she’s silent.

“I missed you Ozzi,” I hug him.

Oz too is restrained and releases only a faint smile.

I hold onto both their hands wondering about their odd silence and at once I sense an inexplicable fear. It takes some time before they shake off their strangeness and hug me.

After lunch we join the long line of vacationers that swamp the elegantly plush resort town of Knokke, sprawled along the beaches of the North Sea and its neighboring Holland. The promenade is spectacular with its natural curves that follow the sea coast closely and twist over several kilometers.

At the end of a long walk we reach a well fostered nature reserve with wooden thickets alongside trails for biking and hiking. Helmut, as usual, disappears on his mountain bike promising to meet us inside the coffee shop planted in the midst of a forest and surrounded by a large open spaced playground.

The place is packed with families and children of all ages, a large crowd bubbling in an assortment of languages all enjoying the wooden play houses set between the tall trees, with bridges and ladders next to swings and slides. The children have fun finding their way out of the wooden mazes. We enjoy the traditional pastries with coffees and hot chocolates then return to the apartment exhausted and ravished.

Stella hurries into the kitchen. Helmut is in the living room with its glassed wide wall fronting the black waters of the North Sea. He plucks his wispy mustache and stares with his bleary eyes at the sudden storm that burst out of nowhere. Both kids are slouched quietly on the couch.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.