The Lies Between Us by Marian Dillon

Author:Marian Dillon [Dillon, Marian]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781474044851
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Published: 2015-01-15T00:00:00+00:00

6

Eva

1988

I’ve never been able to work out what the newspaper seller by the market shouts out. Or at least, I remember my father once telling me that he’s saying Evening Echo! All that’s left now is the vowels, after years of distortion. Like him; a little stooped man in a flat cap.

I walk past him every day after work now, the same man. I can hear his cry from way down, as soon as I turn the corner from George Street and make my way to the bus stop opposite All Saints church. Today, I think to myself that I will actually buy a paper, because I’ve got used to reading the local news and Ed isn’t around to bring one home. He’s down in Cambridge with Stella, he left early this morning. I look at my watch and wonder what he’s doing now. He didn’t tell me what time they would be going to Josh’s park; I suppose they would have just gone when it felt right.

It’s been a weird day; I haven’t been able to stop thinking of him down there. When he left the flat this morning his face was all set and no nonsense, like this was something he had to do and the sooner it was over the better. I can imagine feeling like that; it wouldn’t exactly be a joy. He hadn’t said any more about it since the weekend, when I managed to get out of him that they would lay some flowers under a particular tree where they scattered the ashes. They used to sit by it, he said, a horse chestnut tree. He said that Josh used to lie in his pram and gaze up at the pattern of sunlight coming through the leaves, waving his little fat arms in the air. That’s my description, about the arms. That’s how I imagine it. Ed doesn’t describe it, he just states it.

At work today, while talking customers through their cheap holidays on the Costa del Sol, suddenly I would get images flashing into my mind, like memories of something I’d actually seen:

Ed greeting Stella with a light kiss;

Stella making coffee in the kitchen, with him standing around awkwardly in what used to be his own house;

Ed laying flowers by a tree, holding hands with Stella and giving her a comforting hug.

Ed sitting opposite Stella with a glass of wine, sharing memories of Josh, and confiding in one another how they’re doing now;

Ed at the top of the stairs, making his way to the spare room and maybe turning to look at Stella …

Why wouldn’t they, for old times’ sake?

There were moments today I got way ahead of myself, picturing them sitting over breakfast just like they used to, and one of them saying, with the lightest touch so that it could be interpreted any way: Why did we split up? I was going over and over this, while filing some invoices in the big cabinet. I think I may have even muttered

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