Stillbirth, Yet Still Born by Deborah L Davis

Author:Deborah L Davis [Davis, Deborah L.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Grief
Publisher: Fulcrum Publishing
Published: 2014-07-08T06:00:00+00:00

I won’t ever forget those three days. They helped me acknowledge just how perfect my son was. I had an instinctive need to hold him and look after him and I just had to allow myself to do it. I vaguely remember someone asking if I wanted him put in the morgue. I couldn’t even consider it. Part of me, deep down, knew our time was limited. And I wanted every second of it. . . . I spent the night holding Finley, cuddling up to him, sleeping with my baby in my arms. We took photos of the two of us. You can see my tears in them. Even though they’re distressing, the memories are precious. I wouldn’t be without them. For me, there’s nothing more beautiful—more natural—than a mum cradling her baby as he sleeps.

—Mel

Cherished memories

Whatever your decisions about spending time with your baby, you can reflect on all your memories of being with your baby. During your pregnancy, your baby was cradled inside you or your partner. You can remember the kicks and stirrings of a little life. If you held your baby after delivery, you can try to remember how he or she looked and felt. If you delivered more than one baby, having the chance to see all your babies together validates the experience of “my twins” or “my triplets” or more. Although it may never seem like enough, these memories can be cherished evidence that your baby was real and so is your parental devotion.

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