Sex Tape: A Sid Volke Detective Mystery Book One by Shane Simmons

Author:Shane Simmons [Simmons, Shane]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Eyestrain Productions
Published: 2016-10-27T04:00:00+00:00

Blow Out

December 29th

THE SUN WAS up but Sid and Alexandra weren’t. They had fallen asleep on the park bench, leaning into each other in an awkward position that would make for sore muscles in the coming days. Their mouths hung open, alternately snoring or drooling, sometimes both at once. A curt bleat of a siren disturbed the tableau, waking them both with a start.

They rubbed their eyes and found themselves staring at a couple of officers in a Westmount patrol car that had pulled up to the curb across from them.

“Hey!” said the one on the passenger side through his open window, “No loitering here. Move along.”

Sid lifted his hand sleepily in a motion that waved at them and shooed them away at once. Westmount had its very own public-safety department. They weren’t cops, but they knew how to hassle people just like the real thing.

Sid rose to his feet with a groan and helped Alexandra up.

“Right,” he said, “I forgot. This neighbourhood is too rich to let anybody sleep on a park bench.”

“I guess you’re allowed to patronize the homeless here, you just can’t be one,” said Alexandra.

►►▌

Sid and Alexandra completed their walk of shame an hour later—an early morning return in evening-only wear. The few people about made sure to spare them long, embarrassing stares as they turned up the final street to Sid’s flat in their soiled and torn party clothes.

Up the winding stairs, Sid let them into his apartment. He took one look at the disarray of the place and declared, “Oh my God, I’ve been ransacked!”

To Alexandra, it looked exactly the same as it always did.

“How can you tell?” she asked.

Sid flicked on a light. Instantly, a huge, looming, fang-faced shadow fell across them. He and Alexandra both recoiled in terror until they looked up and saw Hoagy looking down at them from inside a large bowl-shaped light fixture on the ceiling. The light behind him cast a large shadow as he observed them from over the glass lip.

“Hoagy?” said Sid. “What are you doing up there?”

There was no explanation beyond a single, pathetic meow.

“Some guard cat you are,” Sid told him.

Alexandra stepped over the destruction as Sid wandered through his home, taking inventory of new damage only he could perceive.

“Well, I think we touched a nerve last night,” he announced.

“I kinda figured that one out the moment we got tossed out on our ear,” said Alexandra.

“Yeah, but what were they looking for here?”

“They must think we have the tape.”

“Which means they don’t have it either,” concluded Sid. “Breakfast?”

Sid ducked into the bathroom long enough to pluck one of his onions from the miniature garden in the sink.

“I’ll skip, thanks,” said Alexandra. “I like something to go with my onions. Like an actual meal.”

Sid peeled the onion, letting the skin and dirt cascade to the floor. He bit into it like a ripe apple. Alexandra turned away, unable to stomach Sid’s eating habits so early in the morning after a poor night’s sleep in the cold.

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