Monsters by C. Gockel

Author:C. Gockel [Gockel, C.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Loki, norse mythology, fantasy, urban fantasy, contemporary fantasy
Publisher: C. Gockel
Published: 2015-11-15T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter 7

“Is that a poodle dyed pink, or a Midgardian animal I’ve never seen before?” says Loki, staring at the Star Trek Original Series episode on the television screen. He tilts his head. “Hoenir would approve of this evolution.”

“Poodle dyed pink,” says Amy, and he frowns. She and Loki are on her EZ Boy chairs, watching Star Trek and eating Chinese food. It’s just a few days after Mr. Slithers graced Chicago with his presence. This isn’t how she expected her evening to go, but it’s great. Granted, seeing the line of caterers with pan loads of Chinese food outside when she got home from work was a little disconcerting — especially when they started demanding payment. But as soon as Loki stepped out of her apartment, it all made perfect sense.

“So you’ve never heard about the Three Billy Goats Gruff,” says Amy. She has her list out. “I was sure there was a connection between that and the trolls finding goat meat irresistible.”

Loki gives her a look that is almost sympathetic, or maybe it is just the headache he was complaining about earlier that is causing his brow to furrow. “It doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. It just means I’ve never heard of any goats speaking troll.”

She looks down at her list. He can’t animate statues, either — though he says Hoenir could do it. And he’s never turned anyone into black-footed ferrets. Those were questions that Bryant and Brett said they’d snagged from the comics.

She looks at the last entry on her list. “Can you teleport?” It’s something comic-book and movie-Loki can do, but myth-Loki can’t.

Loki chokes on whatever he is eating. Thumping his chest, he sputters. “Teleport?”

“Yeah, you know...” She moves her hand in empty air.

He stares at her blankly.

“It’s when —”

Pulling out his mobile phone he smiles triumphantly. “Tele as in telephone, and port, as in to carry or move! I only use temporary mobile services, but I always teleport. I thought you knew?”

Amy’s brow furrows. “Actually, it means, um, like in Star Trek, when they dematerialize through the transporter...”

Loki gives her a look like she’s kicked a puppy. “The only way my atoms will dematerialize would be with a rather large explosion...and there would be no putting them back together.”

He looks down at the noodles he was just eating and puts them aside, looking a little disgusted.

“Right,” says Amy. She’ll put that down as a ‘no.’

“Awww...the pink doggie died...” says Loki looking back at the pre-CGI pre-Muppet alien on the screen.

They watch several more episodes of Star Trek. It’s kind of fun, like old times at Amy’s grandmother’s house. But with agents with guns parked outside, a portal to dwarf world’s troll lands a few blocks off, and an apartment filled with surveillance devices. There’s also lots of Chinese food — lots and lots of Chinese food. It was fun sampling all the dishes. Apparently if you can order in Mandarin, you really get the good stuff.

Abraham Lincoln is chatting with Captain Kirk, and Amy is about to fall asleep when she remembers one last thing.

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