Messages by Matthew McKay

Author:Matthew McKay [Matthew McKay, Martha Davis, and Patrick Fanning]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781608820948
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications

Thelma was now ready to go into her boss’s office and negotiate effectively.

Turning Options into Proposals

You’ve established a good working relationship with your opponents. You’ve stated and discussed the problem in terms of your mutual and conflicting interests. You’ve privately prepared your list of acceptable options, and now you’re ready to make a proposal.

Approach the proposal slowly. Describe the option you like best in detail. Then move on to the next best one. Ask your opponents which option they prefer. By offering choice and inviting discussion, you avoid confronting them with an ultimatum that will lock them into a defensive position. Sometimes the opposition will even start brainstorming with you in a genuine attempt at joint problem solving.

If at any point in describing your options you find your opponents in an agreeable frame of mind, hit them with an approvable proposal. An approvable proposal is one of your acceptable options stated as a direct question to which yes is an easy answer. For example, if you want a 20 percent raise, you should ask, “If I can straighten out the production bottleneck and increase productivity, would you be willing to give me a 20 percent raise?” This proposal is much better than “I really need a 20 percent raise. Why can’t I have it?” The first proposal is conditional on something the boss wants and can’t be denied without implying that increased productivity is undesirable or that excellence shouldn’t be rewarded. The second proposal is poor because it’s based only on your needs and invites the boss to make a list of reasons why not. The following is a list of deniable proposals restated as approvable proposals:

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