If Cats Disappeared from the World by Genki Kawamura

If Cats Disappeared from the World by Genki Kawamura

Author:Genki Kawamura
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Flatiron Books


* * *

The two-hour screening came to an end. We stepped outside the theater, where the quiet and darkness enveloped us.

“Do you feel sad?” she asked as we exited the theater.

“I don’t know.”

“I guess it must be rough on you.”

“I’m not sure. Sorry, I really don’t know how I feel right now.”

And I truly didn’t know. I wasn’t sure if I was sad because I was going to die or if I was sad because something really important and meaningful was about to disappear from the world.

“You can come back and see me anytime, you know, if you ever feel bad, if you’re ever in so much pain that you can’t stand it.” Her words reached me just as I was about to turn away to leave.

“Thank you,” I said, and headed up the hill toward home.

“Wait!” she shouted from behind me.

“One more quiz!”

“Not again…”

“Just one more. This is the last question.” As she spoke, I realized that tears had welled up in her eyes and were beginning to spill over. Seeing her cry made me feel like crying as well.

“Okay,” I agreed. “I’ll give it one last go.”

“Whenever I see a movie with a sad ending, I always rewatch it at least one more time. Do you remember why?”

This time I knew the answer. It’s the one thing that I remembered well about her. It’s something I was hoping would happen during the plane ride back from Buenos Aires, and even for a while after we broke up.

“Yes, I know,” I responded.

“So what’s the answer?”

“Because you’re hoping that maybe it’ll have a happy ending the next time around.”

“Right! That’s it!” She wiped her eyes roughly with her sleeve, and giving me a big wave, she shouted, “May the force be with you!”

To which I responded while holding back tears, “I’ll be back!”

When I got back home, Aloha was waiting for me, sporting a big grin. He gave me his weird squint-wink, and with that, movies disappeared.

In that moment, I thought about one of my mother’s favorite movies. It was an Italian movie by Fellini called La Strada. The story went like this:

Gelsomina, a naive young woman, is sold by her impoverished mother to a brutish circus strongman, Zampanò, who wants Gelsomina for his wife and partner. She remains loyal despite the abuse she suffers at Zampanò’s hands as they travel the Italian countryside performing together. Eventually Gelsomina grows weaker, and when the abuse becomes intolerable, she begins to physically waste away. So Zampanò abandons her. A few years later the traveling circus arrives in a seaside town and Zampanò hears a young woman singing a song that Gelsomina used to sing. Zampanò finds out that Gelsomina has died, but her song lives on. Listening to the young woman singing Gelsomina’s song, Zampanò realizes that he really loved her. He walks to the shore and collapses in tears on the beach. Crying won’t bring her back, but in the end he realizes that although he really did love her, he was incapable of treating her as though he did when they were together.



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